Ryan Navigates '90 - #11 (2/11 - 2/17)
The first Bret vs. Shawn, guys get tangled in barbed wire, Hogan and Warrior try to outcrazy each other again, Luger turns, Pillman shows out, and more!
Good day!
We have a full week this time, which includes another very busy Saturday. We’ll get a historic first-time singles meeting between what would end up being a very controversial rivalry, early FMW deathmatch action, a couple of matches featuring Brian Pillman, Jerry Lawler out the wazoo, and much, MUCH more!
*** This article will have a match involving barbed wire. I won’t post anything overly gory in the pictures, but the description may not be for the squeamish.
Reader discretion is advised ***
SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 11th
WWF Wrestling Challenge
Bret “Hitman” Hart vs. Shawn Michaels - We start the week off with some history as this is the very first singles encounter between these two. Both men are firmly ensconced in the tag division at this point, but Bret has had more opportunities to showcase his singles wares.
Oddly enough, this was babyface vs. babyface back when it was rare for the WWF to do that (well, except for the WrestleMania VI main event). They did that a lot with the Rockers and the Hart Foundation for some reason.
Their respective partners (Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart and Marty Jannetty) accompany them to ringside. This was before Bret started putting his sunglasses onto fans at ringside, so Neidhart tries (and fails) to hand them to a youngster.
Both guys wrestle clean at the start, with Michaels getting the first one-up with an armdrag. However, Hart catches him with an inverted atomic drop and a big clothesline, but he misses with an elbow. Michaels soon hits a dropkick, but Bret hurls Shawn off the top rope and lays in some European uppercuts. However, Michaels catches one with a backslide for a very close two, then flips out of a sideslam and hits a legdrop.
Both guys collide heads, then fight over a vertical suplex that neither guy can muster. Tempers start to flare, and Bret clocks Shawn with a closed fist as Marty hops onto the apron. Anvil then hops onto the apron, and everybody comes in for a brawl as we get a double-DQ! Both teams continue scrapping until officials come in to break it up.
**1/2 - This was very short, but really competitive and fun for the four-and-a-half minutes it lasted. You can see glimpses of brilliance from both guys as Shawn’s offense was exciting, and Bret hit everything with his customary snap. As a match, it isn’t must-see or anything, but as a historical curiosity, it’s great.
MONDAY, FEBRUARY 12th
FMW Battle Brave In Korakuen
Barbed Wire Match: Atsushi Onita vs. Masanobu Kurisu - Kurisu had been wrestling since 1972, having trained under Antonio Inoki in the New Japan Dojo. He was mostly a journeyman, wrestling underneath the main event in NJPW and spending some time in Mexico. Around this time, he was gaining a reputation for violence, mostly via the use of a steel chair. Basically, an old, angry, Japanese La Parka. Kurisu also worked as a trainer, with Koji Kanemoto, Kikutaro, and Akira Raijin (Kiyoshi in TNA) counted among his pupils.
One might have imagined a no-rope barbed wire match, but this isn’t what we have. In this match, there are barbed wire boards laying on the outside of the ring.
Kurisu comes up to Onita as he’s making his way to the ring, slapping, headbutting, and kicking him on the apron to keep him at bay.
Onita enters the ring, and Kurisu makes him pay with LOUD chops, like a gun went off in Korakuen Hall. Kurisu nearly drives Onita into the boards, but Onita manages to stave him off and nearly knocks Kurisu into some wire. After Kurisu fights out, Onita hits him with the Stroke, Jeff Jarrett’s finisher! Bree woo! Onita peppers him with chops, but Kurisu is like “oh, you dumb bitch” and blasts him with a headbutt and another wicked chop. Kurisu finally shoves Onita out of the ring and into the wire.
Onita struggles back to his feet as the wire is sticking to his gear and his flesh. Kurisu kicks him back down onto the wire like a dick. The camera zooms in on a very nasty, deep gash on his chest that I am NOT posting here. Kurisu mercilessly stomps him on the apron as there’s also a HUGE laceration on Onita’s back. Onita catches another Kurisu stomp and tries to pull HIM into the wire! Kurisu lands on the edge of one of the boards, which would still suck because he’s wearing standard wrestling trunks and no shirt. At least Onita’s wearing a top, though it’s not exactly doing him much good.
Back in, Onita lands a diving headbutt for two, but Kurisu takes over with some brutal stomps. Kurisu drives Onita back into the barbed wire, then graciously knocks him back into it after a vicious headbutt. Onita again tries to yank Kurisu out of the ring, and after much resistance and screaming from the crowd, finally dumps him onto the wire, full-on!
Kurisu makes it onto the apron, only to get his face rammed into the turnbuckle. They get into a slapping match, then Kurisu hits Onita with a superplex for two. Kurisu locks in a half-crab, which Onita breaks via the ropes.
Kurisu stomps a hole in him and pushes him again into the wire. Kurisu, the madman, teases a dive onto Onita, but thinks better of it. Onita makes it onto the apron and rallies back with a series of sick headbutts to Kurisu! Onita scores with a DDT, then, after some struggle, powerbombs Kurisu onto his NECK for two. Sweet baby Jesus.
Onita follows with another powerbomb for three!
After the match, we shake hands and hug. SPORTSMANSHIP!
**3/4 - I’m of two worlds with this one. When they were just having a regular match, it was actually quite good, with some super-stiff striking from Kurisu and Onita’s fiery comeback. However, the stuff with the barbed wire held this one back.
Don’t get me wrong; I actually really enjoy a good deal of deathmatch stuff, though I completely understand those who don’t have the desire to watch it. My issue with this match in particular was that it was a lot of laying around in barbed wire on the outside, causing the bout to grind to a halt at times. To be fair, they were still figuring this style of wrestling out, and it’s rather interesting to see a prototypical version of what FMW would be known for. They’d escalate in craziness over the years.
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 17th
WWF Superstars of Wrestling
Alright, kids, who’s ready for MORE BATSHIT INSANITY from Hulk Hogan and Ultimate Warrior?!?
We start with Hulk, who thanks WWF President Jack Tunney for “expressing his executive privilege” to make the match with the WARYAH at WrestleMania VI official.
Over the last week, the Hulkamaniacs have been asking him if Hulkamania was still the most powerful force in the universe. Hogan expresses disbelief at seeing Warrior’s body in the WWF Magazine and how he carries his opponents over his shoulder “into the unknown”. But deep down, Hulkamaniacs, Hogan knows that the trainin’, the prayers, and the vitamins can overcome the Warrior and his GODS.
Hogan tells Jack Tunney to put the WWF Championship on the line for the match, then talks about having nightmares about Warrior carrying him on his shoulder and into the darkness. However, with the millions of Hulkamaniacs on his side, Warrior won’t even budge him, BROTHER.
Hogan then invites Warrior onto HIS shoulder to take the position of #1 Hulkamaniac after WrestleMania VI, replacing previous #1 Hulkamaniac, God. Hogan finishes with the usual.
We flip it over to the snarling, grunting Warrior, who is talking to his arms before addressing HO KOGAN.
Warrior claims that Hogan has walked into “a frustration like the normal who have traveled before us”. Great warriors before them have injected themselves with the “poison of mankind”, giving everything they’ve had. Doubt, rules, regulations, the normal things that normal people adhere to, mean NOTHING to Warrior or his pack of Warriors! Warrior fed HO KOGAN with the life and intensity to allow the Hulkamaniacs to… feel the beauty? I’m sorry, WHAT?!?
The deeper Warrior went into the darkness, the closer he was to giving in to the light. Warrior is REALITY! Warrior is the frustration that mankind has swept under the rug for years. At WrestleMania VI, he brings THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR, THE ULTIMATE CHALLENGE, ULTIMATE REALITY!
Cocaine is a HELL of a drug.
Again, Hogan was off his rocker with his amplified brand of grandiose bullshit, but at least you can understand what he’s going for. Warrior’s promos are incredibly bizarre word salads. However, it’s still fascinating to witness.
We kick it to The Brother Love Show, where Slick and Akeem guest this week. This makes me happy because I get to hear Slick’s theme music, “Jive Soul Bro”, one of the all-time great entrance tracks. In fact, it’s time for our very first MUSIC BREAK of Ryan Navigates ‘90!
Love brings up the failed plan to retrieve Ted DiBiase’s Million Dollar Belt from Jake “The Snake” Roberts that resulted in the Big Boss Man leaving Slick’s employ. Slick says he shouldn’t have trusted “that redneck from Cobb County, Georgia in the first place”.
He can still trust Akeem, though! Slick challenges Boss Man to engage Akeem in fisticuffs, then Akeem promises to put Boss Man in the hospital for attacking Slick.
Ted DiBiase and Virgil then come out. The Million Dollar Man again lambasts Roberts for stealing his title and proclaims Boss Man to be STUPID for not taking his money. DiBiase then promises financial incentive for Akeem to take out the Big Boss Man.
A fun little promo segment to set up Akeem vs. Boss Man at WrestleMania and continue to tie the DiBiase/Roberts and Akeem/Boss Man programs together.
USWA Championship Wrestling (Memphis)
Much to Jerry “The King” Lawler’s chagrin, we start with clips of The King & The Soultaker vs. Junkyard Dog & King Cobra from the Mid-South Coliseum. Cobra socks Lawler with a sweet right and blasts him with a headbutt, but the referee isn’t there for the cover. Cobra goes to retrieve the referee, so Lawler reaches into his boot and grabs a chain, because Memphis.
Lawler clobbers Cobra with the chain, and the ref covers for three…or so we think. JYD apprises the ref of the chain chicanery, so the ref searches him and finds the smoking gun…er, chain! The match must continue!
It’s a four-way fray, with JYD getting a quick (and bad) roll-up on Soultaker for the three! After the match, Lawler calls JYD back for some revenge. However, that goes pear-shaped for Lawler as JYD whacks him with a headbutt and covers him for another pin! This is like a speedrun of crazy Memphis finishes.
Back at the desk, Lawler rants about the restart to Dave Brown and denies use of the chain. Dave then throws it to a pre-tape from Junkyard Dog, who cuts a really fun, albeit longwinded, promo on Lawler and Soultaker. In 1990, everyone in Tennessee will know the NASTY DOG!
I’m 310 pounds! I’m a little twisted steel and NO sex appeal at all!
The Dog will find himself a BONE to chew on in Memphis, Tennessee! The promo does go off the rails a bit by the end, but the man can still talk.
Back to Lawler, who gets a quality zinger on the Dog.
“He wanted to send Mr. T a fan letter, but he couldn’t spell his last name”.
He goes in on JYD’s family history, claiming to trace his family tree back to “when they used to live in one”. JESUS. His parents were in the iron and steel business (“His mother irons, and his father steals”). Lawler gets serious, saying he’s going to beat the Dog down like a, well, dog, and promises to give him something to chew on at the Mid-South Coliseum.
We now cut back to Lawler, who addresses a letter that asks why he calls himself a world champion when he only defends the title in Tennessee and Texas. Lawler rebuts these claims by showing mentions of him in wrestling magazines, including Pro Wrestling Illustrated and a two-page spread in a Japanese mag.
Lawler goes over a pretty stuffed schedule to further prove his worldliness. He then claims that Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair are not real world champions because they can only wrestle those who are in the WWF and the NWA, respectively. Lawler’s USWA Unified World Heavyweight Championship can be defended anywhere, making him the only WORLD champion in wrestling.
Have you had your fill of Jerry Lawler yet? Well, tough shit, because it’s now time for Jerry Lawler to roast the WMC-5 studio fans! He gets a couple of jabs to start us off, but he meets his match in a sassy Black woman who calls him out for his choice of wardrobe.
“You wear pink and you stink!”
Jerry asks if she’s a lady, and she replies back with, “are you a man?!?”. Lawler roars back by saying, “they want to get a picture of you to put in jail to cure sex offenders”. Good lord.
NWA Worldwide Wrestling
The Midnight Express (“Beautiful” Bobby Eaton & “Sweet” Stan Lane) vs. Flyin’ Brian & The Z-Man - This is the semifinals of the US Tag Team title tournament. The Fabulous Freebirds have already advanced to the finals after defeating the Dynamic Dudes.
Pillman and Lane start us off, with Pillman getting the best of both Midnights with armdrags and other manner of white meat babyface offense. Pillman gets a boot to Eaton’s midsection, and Z-Man tags in and lands an enzuigiri for two. Eaton gets a brief spat of offense until Zenk catches him and an interfering Lane with scoop slams. Pillman comes in but ends up getting assaulted in the corner by Beautiful Bobby. However, Flyin’ Brian escapes a superplex and lays in some big chops on Eaton, followed by a flying headscissors.
Pillman catches Eaton with a crucifix for two, but Eaton fights him off and tags in Lane. However, the MXE can’t catch a break, with Sweet Stan getting pinballed by Pillman and Zenk.
Eaton comes in and continues to not make headway, getting slammed by the babyfaces. Lane knees Z-Man in the back from the apron and holds him in place, but Pillman knees Eaton from the apron! Eaton gets whipped into Lane and falls victim to a double back-body drop, then Lane gets hit with the double dropkick! After a quick breather, Lane manages a gutwrench on Zenk, and Bobby hits a nice swinging neckbreaker as the Express finally gets a sustained upper hand. Lane hits some kicks in the corner and goes for a cannonball in the opposite one, but Zenk dodges. So much for THAT advantage.
Z-Man crawls around and evades both Midnights, then slingshots Pillman in for a double clothesline! Pillman hits some dropkicks and a flying back elbow, then it’s a four-way fray. Zenk has a sleeper on Lane, so Jim Cornette tries to sneak in with the tennis racket…but Zenk catches HIM with a sleeper! The crowd erupted with that one.
Lane smashes Zenk with the tennis racket, but Z-Man kicks out of the pin! The Express go for the Rocket Launcher, but Z-Man moves! Pillman hits a crossbody on Eaton for the three!
**3/4 - This was a lot of fun, but it was REALLY lopsided in favor of Pillman and Z-Man. The Midnights didn’t really get to work any kind of sustained control segment to build heat as the faces were always one step ahead. Pillman and Zenk got to look VERY strong for the finals, though. The finish was well-done, and everything was smoothly executed for the most part.
Pillman & Zenk will face The Fabulous Freebirds in the finals next week. We’ll have that match (well, the finish at least) soon.
NWA World Championship Wrestling
We start with Flyin’ Brian, who is with Jim Ross on the interview platform. He discusses being personally hurt by what the Four Horsemen did to Sting at the Clash of the Champions.
He calls Ric Flair out to explain what happened, and the Nature Boy comes out with Woman. He says that Pillman came a long way since they traveled together for a brief period, but things come to an end for anyone who gets in the way of the Horsemen. Flair says that, if Brian doesn’t like what happened to Sting, to SHUT HIM UP, then challenges him to a match tonight!
Flair throws it to Woman, who says that Pillman doesn’t know the difference between “men and boys”. Pillman retorts by saying he knows the difference, then asks if she knows the difference between “a lady and a tramp”! Whoa!
Flair is incensed and restates the challenge, which Pillman accepts. Brian tells Flair that he’s coming after HIS ASS, back when “ass” was considered heavy-duty profanity. This was great stuff from all involved, with some tremendous fire from Pillman.
We catch up with Sting, who had just recently undergone knee surgery. Sting knew the injury was bad when it happened, and the inability to take on Flair at Wrestle War resulted in a bit of depression. Sting informs us of the 6-12 month recovery time, which would be fairly typical for the injury he sustained. Of course, he’d come back way ahead of schedule.
Ross mentions that current US champion Lex Luger has been slotted in to be Flair’s challenger at the PPV. Sting doesn’t have much love for the Total Package (who was a heel at the time), but he has even less love for Flair, so he’s pulling for Luger to take the title. Sting may even sit at ringside for the match.
Speaking of Luger, he is this week’s guest on Jim Cornette’s Louisville Slugger. Luger wears the absolute HELL out that white shirt.
Corny asks about Lex's upcoming title match at Wrestle War ‘90, but the Horsemen (and Woman) immediately drop in. Ole Anderson tells Luger to listen, pointing out that the Horsemen outnumber The Total Package 3-to-1. Ole recaps what happened to “Mr. Sting”, then gives Luger to the end of the show to cancel his title shot. Luger laughs his ass off, so Ole continues to threaten him if he does not announce his withdrawal from the match with Flair.
The Horsemen leave Lex to chew on it, though Flair trips and falls on his ass when leaving the ring, much to the crowd’s delight. Luger has trouble keeping it together as a result.
Luger promises an answer by the end of the hour, but he hints that he’s not backing down. For what was essentially a rushed face turn, they handled it quite well by using Luger’s cockiness against the Horsemen.
Luger was having a peak run as a heel, so it’s a shame that it had to end somewhat abruptly. However, it’s not like WCW was replete with options to face a heel Flair in a PPV main event on relatively short notice, which is an indictment of the NWA’s lack of babyface roster depth and contingency planning.
Ric Flair vs. Flyin’ Brian - Hey, it’s the match that was set up earlier in the broadcast! No title on the line here; just bad blood.
We get some Pillman shine to start, with a dropkick sending Flair over the top as the crowd is electric already. Flair corners Pillman with chops, so Brian retaliates with some stiff ones of his own, the last one putting Flair on his arse. Flair again backs Pillman into a corner and lights him up with chops, but it’s more of the same, with Pillman firing back in kind and giving us a Flair Flop as a result. Pillman continues assaulting Flair until the Nature Boy powders.
Brian chases him up the aisle and we brawl for a bit. They blister each other with chops on the outside, then resume the war between the ropes. Flair begs off, so Pillman makes him pay with some corner punches…which Flair counters with an inverted atomic drop. Flair works Pillman over for a bit, dropping some knees and pummeling him in the corner as the crowd rallies behind Brian.
Pillman kicks out of a blitz of pin attempts after a double-underhook suplex and a stalling vertical suplex, but Flair cuts off a comeback with a back suplex out of a sleeperhold. Flair goes for the Figure Four, but Pillman counters with a small package for a near-fall. Flair then hits the kneebreaker, then continues to castigate the leg for the next few moments. Flair gets the Figure Four this time, using the ropes for extra leverage like the bastard he is.
Flair gets a couple of two-counts off that, but Flyin’ Brian wills his way into a reversal. Flair immediately seeks refuge on the floor, but Pillman suplexes him back into the ring as the crowd is getting even more heated. Pillman punishes Flair with chops to further his rally, then hits a dropkick…but Flair cuts him off with a kick to the leg. Pillman manages a sunset flip, but Woman slaps him to break it up!
The ref allows the match to continue, but Flair knees a distracted Pillman in the back. He goes to toss Brian over the top…but Pillman skins the cat back in and lands Air Pillman for one HELL of a near-fall! Pillman hits a crossbody off the top…but Flair rolls through and grabs a handful of trunks to keep Brian down for three! Flair barely ekes out the win.
***3/4 - Flair again gives us a killer free TV match, this time with a much more hard-hitting bout than you’d expect. Both guys absolutely leathered each other with chops, and there was an overall intensity that was only amplified by the frenzied crowd. Excellent aggression from Pillman, and that near-fall with the Air Pillman was REALLY well-done.
The Horsemen storm the interview platform as the clock is running out on Luger. The Total Package comes out as the Horsemen assume that he’s going to cave into their demands.
Luger gives his answer…by decking all three guys and heading for the hills! The Horsemen are LIVID. We’ll see Luger vs. Flair at Wrestle War ‘90!
USWA Championship Sports
We close out this week with a music video for “Superstar” Bill Dundee.
Set to “Gypsies on Parade” by Sawyer Brown, we see Dundee stopping by a local cafe, dumping an ungodly heap of sugar into his coffee, using a payphone, and other stuff that is literally described by the lyrics. He also drives down the highway with his right blinker on like an ASSHOLE. I mean, he does merge onto the off-ramp, but you don’t need to signal THAT far in advance, bud.
We also get plenty of classic wrestling footage that feature him against Nick Bockwinkel, The Moondogs, Bullet Bob Armstrong, and others. The actual wrestling action looks pretty awesome, and the narrative portion is kind of goofy, but it really works. Dundee came off as a relatable everyman here.
Now it's time for THE TUGBOAT TRIBUNE!
As always, the news comes courtesy of Dave Meltzer and the Wrestling Observer Newsletter.
You remember that whole deal where boxing champion Mike Tyson signed on to referee Hulk Hogan vs. “Macho King” Randy Savage on an episode of WWF Main Event, thus drawing a billion dollars and a massive television rating? Well…
In the Tokyo Dome on February 11th, Tyson ended up getting KNOCKED OUT in the 10th round by 42-1 underdog James “Buster” Douglas. This is considered one of the greatest upsets in sports history.
Tyson’s status for the Main Event is very much in question, but probably won’t happen now that he’s the laughingstock of the athletic world.
Since this wasn’t heavily advertised nationally, the impact on the WWF should be minimal. Still kind of funny, though.
Buster Douglas actually ends up taking Tyson’s place as referee.
Along with “Dr. Death” Steve Williams, Great Muta and the Dragon Master have exited the NWA after Clash of the Champions X.
In Williams’ case, he was offered a severely reduced contract, so he told the NWA to go pound sand and opted to work for NJPW and AJPW instead.
Muta in particular was frustrated with his booking. The NWA had wanted to turn him babyface, but it was rumored that Gary Hart got it into Muta’s head that the fans would never root for a Japanese face (despite the fans cheering for him every chance they got despite being him being a heel). As a result, Muta never wanted to turn out of fear of getting lost in the shuffle or not being over, and both him and the NWA pretty much gave up.
Hart had actually disputed this claim over the years, so take that theory with a grain of salt.
Dragon Master left because…I really don’t know. Sorry to leave y’all hanging like that.
NEXT TIME: Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage tangle on The Main Event, The Horsemen renew hostilities with the Rock N’ Roll Express, and more!
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I never would've thought Bret and Shawn touched each other in 1990 outside of a tag match. Even in a quick TV double DQ if you squint you can see what's around the bend, at least for Bret (I'm a Bret over Shawn guy. I'm not apologizing).
You nail my exact issue with a lot of deathmatch wrestling, which is that a lot of time is spent laying still, or standing still setting up some stunt. I say 'stunt' and not wrestling move because it looks so fake, and if it hurts so bad that you have to be so cautious that you can't make it look real, why do it?
Both of these opinions are just side notes to my true takeaway from this week, which is the same takeaway from most weeks, which is that I will NEVER have my fill of Jerry Lawler. In one paragraph he gets in racism, and classism, and in the succeeding few minutes he throws in shots at Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan (both of whom are not going to wrestle Jerry Lawler), and some sexism on top. Do not binge watch Jerry Lawler, but once per week this is fantastic, and brings me to yet another point.
I miss when heels used to be offensive.
Perhaps I'm in the minority here, but every Jerry promo used to contain something that'd get the network thrown off the TV network today, and that's fantastic, because he's the BAD GUY. I hate how modern wrestling is forced to be so PC there are no legitimately bad people on TV anymore. The only two villain archetypes that seem to work on NA TV are the 'I'm better than you. How can you ever beat me?' types, like MJF, Gunther, Roman Reigns (pre WM), etc., and the 'I'm in a position I clearly don't belong' types (the Elite, Solo Sikoa, the Rock, etc.). Every other supposed villain either gets cheered or is so poor they get no reaction at all.
I'm reminded of Triple H telling Booker T that 'someone like *you* doesn't get to be world champion.' People look back on this these days as if it was cringe, but I think exactly the opposite. It was a fantastic way to get me to cheer for Booker against the evil rich white kid HHH. These days, Adam Page is fighting Swerve, and nobody cares. Could you imagine if Adam played the race card? That'd be a quick way to inject some real hatred into this.
Perhaps I'm unique in yearning for the days before the sponsors would pull the show off TV if the people presented as being bad people actually do anything to indicate that they're bad people, but I'd love for the bad people on the show to actually do bad things like they used to. I'd also love if I could get a grumpy, surly faced old man like Ole Anderson back on my TV in the modern day. I think that's a villain archetype that could work in wrestling today, but nobody is even trying it.
Dude you had me with this pic. I just watched the warrior Rick rude fight for the intercontinental belt on YouTube lol!!!