Ryan's Dive into '95 - Part Fifteen (4/9 - 4/15)
Another GIGANTIC week in 1995. The first GAEA show! The Champion Carnival Finals! ECW Hostile City Showdown! Time limit draws! Coal Miner's Glove! NJPW Juniors action! THE BLUE BLOODS! And MORE!
If you haven’t read it already, please check out my introductory article that explains what this series is all about. As a reminder, footage is sourced from the Goodhelmet 1995 Yearbook, unless otherwise stated.
How ya now?
The fun never stops at The Dive as we have another ridiculously packed week. We close out AJPW's Champion Carnival, a new joshi promotion has their debut show, we have the first match in a legendary rivalry in ECW and installments in a couple other feuds, SMW has footage from their big double-weekend, and we get more Blue Bloods greatness. Despite this week having a ton of stuff, there is no WWF-generated content at all. Not even a Slim Jim commercial.
Get comfy, friends. This is gonna be another long one.
Well…
APRIL 9th
WCW Main Event - Awwwwww, shit, more Blue Bloods! Bobby is getting groomed and pampered because him and Regal are going to totally and legitimately meet the Queen of England.
Regal is now working on pronunciation by having Eaton say “HOW NOW BROWN COW”, but that doesn't exactly go well. Sadly, they don't break out into “The Life of the Wife is Ended by the Knife”.
We cut to Buckingham Palace as Bobby gets knighted by who I assume is the very real Queen of England.
Regal is in absolute tears of joy. We then move to a shoeshine stand.
Regal: “I wonder what the poor people are doing now?”
Eaton: “Who cares?”
Bobby's gleeful delivery of that last line completely ended me. More greatness from these guys. It's a shame that we seem to open with Blue Bloods vignettes for these reviews because it's all downhill from here.
APRIL 11th
ECW Hardcore TV - I guess we don't have anything from RAW this week, so it's on to The Land of Extreme! We start with Tod Gordon, who announces the “indefinite suspension” (well, firing) of Sabu for laying the Women's tag team titles on Johnny Ace's desk and walking out not honoring his commitments.
We then cut to Cactus Jack doing a Bob Dylan impression, then talks about falling out of love with Guns ‘N Roses. He still likes their music, but Axl wearing a Charles Manson T-shirt in a video was a bridge too far for Mick. He compares himself to GnR (Guns ‘N Roses, not Galaxy News Radio) rhythm guitarist Izzy Stradlin and Terry Funk to Axl; an egomaniac unwilling to step out of the limelight. He then recounts a phone call with his mother where he discusses being burned with a branding iron. He promises to take Funk out on April 15th. BANG BANG! Another delightfully unhinged, yet cerebral, promo from Mick.
We now get Terry Funk and his branding iron. Jack is SHORT on guts and heart, but not on STOMACH size. He wants to piss Jack off so he can be a formidable opponent for Terry. He loves his family and runs down Mick's. Another great one from The Funker.
APRIL 12th
AJPW Champion Carnival, Night 17 - We jump into the penultimate night of round robin action.
Mitsuharu Misawa vs. Akira Taue - Misawa is sitting atop the leaderboard at 16 points and this is his final round robin match. Taue is a couple of points behind at 14 and has one more match to go after this (vs. Johnny Ace).
Taue gains the advantage early on by going after Misawa's injured eye. Misawa fights back and dodges some Taue offense in rapid fashion, but Taue catches him with an armdrag. Taue works over the arm for a bit, occasionally going after the eye for added castigation. Double rear wristlock is battled over for a bit, but Misawa finally escapes after flipping out of it. Misawa snags a sleeper, but Taue immediately snapmares out of it and grabs an armbar, then a snug lariat.
Backdrop toss gets two, then we hit the abdominal stretch! Misawa hiptosses out of it, but Taue nails an enzuigiri for two! Taue applies a dragon sleeper, but Misawa makes the ropes, with Taue punishing the eye before breaking. Misawa mounts a comeback, dropkicking Taue out of the ring. He fakes out Taue with some of that FLIPPY SHIT before NAILING an elbow suicida.
Back in, diving elbow smash off the top gets two. Misawa escapes a Nodowa attempt and counters a big boot with an elbow smash. TIGER DRIVER…for two! Misawa maintains control for a bit, kicking the crap out of Taue and working a figure four headscissors. They trade strikes, with Misawa coming out on top. Twisting clothesline gets two, then Misawa grabs a chinlock. Taue counters that with a backdrop driver and a legdrop, BROTHER, for two. Taue works over Misawa for a bit and dodges a missile dropkick attempt. Powerslam by Taue, but Misawa rolls out. Baseball slide dropkick, then Taue tosses Misawa into the railing a few times. Lariat on the floor to Misawa!
Powerbomb attempt is thwarted, but Taue comes back with a short dropkick as the crowd is mighty into this. After a bit of back-and-forth, Taue launches Misawa face first into the turnbuckle, but Misawa scores with some kicks to down Taue. Tiger Driver is thwarted, but Misawa lands a German for two!
Misawa locks in the crossface, but Taue uses his length to make the ropes. Misawa dives at Taue, but Taue just throws him down! Facecrusher from Taue! Falling clothesline gets two. Folding powerbomb gets two…then Misawa catches a desperation roll-up for two! Crowd rallies behind Taue as another lariat gets two. Nodowa…but Misawa counters into a DDT! Frog splash gets two! Tiger Suplex ‘85 is countered, but Misawa grabs another crossface! That gets a two-count. Taue blocks a Misawa dive, then catches him running with a big boot!
NODOWA OTOSHI…gets two! The time limit draws near! On the apron, a Nodowa to the floor is teased, but Misawa dropkicks Taue off the apron. Misawa goes to dive off the apron, but Taue trips him up! NODOWA ON THE FLOOR! That gets two in the ring. DYNAMIC BOMB…BUT MISAWA KICKS OUT! Nodowa is teased, but both guys tumble to the floor! We're rapidly approaching 30 minute here! Misawa smashes Taue with some elbows and nails a Tiger Driver, but Taue kicks out! Time expires! WE HAVE A DRAW!
Misawa ends his tourney with 17 points, and Taue inches up to 15 with the aforementioned match against Johnny Ace set for tomorrow. Taue still has a chance to make the finals if he beats the idiot EVP of Talent Relations.
****1/2 - This was some more great stuff as expected. Misawa showed great resilience, and Taue did a great job with his aggression, making sure to attack Misawa’s injured face as much as he can. Terrific drama as usual here.
The only real gripe I have is that, knowing what would become the match for the finals, I wouldn't have had Misawa kick out of the Dynamic Bomb here. That was the new killer finisher that Taue debuted in this tournament and was used to collect wins over Kobashi and Kawada. I would have had Taue hit it as time was expiring so that it would help build more intrigue for the next meeting. That aside, another great addition to the AJPW catalog of killer matches.
APRIL 13th
AJPW Champion Carnival, Night 18 - Here it is, kids! The last night of round-robin tournament action before the finals on Saturday. During this show, Akira Taue defeated Johnny Ace to match Mitsuharu Misawa at 17 points. It all comes down to the main event.
Toshiaki Kawada vs. Kenta Kobashi - Kawada is at 15 points and needs a win to pull into a tie with Misawa and Taue at the top of the leaderboard. Kobashi is out of the running here at 12 points, so he looks to play spoiler and close out his campaign on a high note. We saw a BANGER 60-minute draw between these two earlier this year, so expect an elevated sense of urgency here as they have half the time to work with.
“KOBASHI” chants fill the air as they dodge and block each other's chops to start. Dueling shoulderblocks lead to DUELING CHOPS! Kobashi chops Kawada’s neck and shoulders him down to assert early dominance. Kawada gets some kicks and a series of chops for two, then we hit the abdominal stretch! Kawada transitions to a double wristlock and works that for a bit, countering Kobashi's counters.
Kobashi finally powers out and hits a release tiger suplex! They go outside where Kobashi abuses Kawada with the guardrail and a guillotine legdrop on the apron for two. Chop to the back and a legdrop, BROTHER, for two. Kawada escapes a chinlock and lays on some of them nasty kicks.
After some VICIOUS corner kicks and knees, Kobashi rolls to the outside for a respite. Kawada whips Kobashi into the railing, but Kobashi rebounds with a lariat on the floor! Back in, they trade BEEFY chops until Kawada hits a chop to the neck! They fight over a brainbuster and tease suplexes to the floor until Kobashi dumps Kawada. Flying shoulderblock from the apron sends Kawada careening into the railing! Kobashi goes for a boot on the floor, but hits the railing instead, buggering up his leg! Kawada dumps Kobashi knee-first on the announce table as the announcer sounds like he is going to have a coronary.
Back in, Kawada starts to abuse the leg and grabs a scorpion deathlock, but Kobashi desperately makes the ropes. Kawada continues destroying the leg, then grabs a NASTY torture crab hold.
Kobashi makes the ropes, but Kawada cuts off a comeback attempt with a dropkick to the legs. Kawada kicks, but Kobashi is FIRING UP! He blocks a kick and throws Kawada back, then HE goes after Kawada's leg! He throws Kawada knee-first on the announce table, which collapses! REVENGE!
Back in, half-crab is applied, but Kawada makes the ropes. Kobashi continues working the leg and grabs a Texas cloverleaf! Kawada again grabs the ropes, but Kobashi continues working the leg until Kawada comes back with a lariat! They start trading strikes like crazy until Kobashi hits a big powerbomb!
Kobashi lays in more chops and lands another powerbomb! Kawada tries to get up but collapses into an absolute heap. Masterful selling, that was. Kobashi hits a legdrop for two! Kawada manages a big boot and a backdrop driver but can't follow up! Another one is thwarted, but Kawada nails a ganmengiri! Kawada snares Kobashi with a Stretch Plum, but Kobashi makes the ropes! Kawada gets a release powerbomb for two! Another powerbomb is attempted, but Kobashi sits on top of Kawada for two! They each dodge spinning backhanded chops until Kobashi grabs a German for two! Kobashi teases a moonsault, but Kawada rolls out of the way. Kobashi grabs a DDT and climbs the ropes…but Kawada cuts him off! Back suplex is attempted, but Kobashi shifts his weight and lands on Kawada!
That gets two as the time limit is nearing! Pumphandle powerbomb gets two! Moonsault lands, but Kawada kicks out! Falling clothesline from Kobashi gets a close two! Rolling cradle from Kobashi gets two! Kobashi tries another moonsault…but misses! Kawada grabs a two-count from that! Ganmengiri hits as we are quickly running out of time! Kawada gets a folding powerbomb…for two! Backdrop driver from Kawada, but he can't get the cover! Kawada desperately tries for another as he feels his tournament slipping away…and we have reached the 30-minute time limit! WE HAVE A DRAW!
****3/4 - Holy crap, what a war. Kawada was desperate for a good result to have a chance at the finals, and Kobashi wanted to finally get that one-on-one victory against his foe. Both guys worked with the expected sense of urgency and created some killer drama and believable near-falls, but they couldn't put each other away. Both guys’ selling of the big moves is also to be commended. These are my two favorite Pillars for a reason.
With the draw, Kobashi ends his bid at 13 points, good for fifth position, and Kawada ties for third place with Stan Hansen at 16 points. Misawa vs. Taue is your Champion Carnival finals! Wanna find out how that goes? Well, read on to find out!
For those curious, here are the final standings:
1. Mitsuharu Misawa & Akira Taue (17 points each)
3. Stan Hansen & Toshiaki Kawada (16 points each)
5. Kenta Kobashi (13 points)
6. Johnny Ace (11 points)
7. Jun Akiyama & Doug Fournas (6 points each)
9. Danny Spivey & Dan Kroffat (4 points each)
11. Takao Omori (0 points)
NJPW Battle Rush, Night 1 - We take a turn off the King's Road and hit up some of that good juniors action from The Lion.
Wild Pegasus & Shinjiro Ohtani vs. Gran Hamada & Koji Kanemoto - Gran Hamada has turned out to be a fairly important wrestler as he was one of the first Japanese workers to fully embrace the Mexican lucha libre style (as he was sent to Mexico earlier in his career due to his smaller size). Through his work as a wrestler and trainer, he would help establish the “lucharesu” style that combined high-flying lucha action with the high-impact Japanese style. This style would define promotions like Michinoku Pro and Toryumon/Dragon Gate. Hamada was one of the first ever trainees in the New Japan dojo, making his debut in 1972. He was a sprightly 44 years old at this point but could still fly around like someone half his age.
Ohtani slaps Kanemoto during the ring announcer intros because, well, Shinjiro Ohtani. Those guys start things off with intense grappling in between bouts of slapping and kicking the snot out of each other. Ohtani grabs a leglock and rubs his fist in Kanemoto's face! After a bit, they stalemate and bring in Benoit and Hamada, and I never realized how short Hamada really is (5’6”, about Rey Misterio's shoot height).
They work the mat for a bit, and there's a bit of lucha influence in there with some armdrags and quick grappling. Given both men's history in Mexico, it makes sense. Pegasus takes over with a nasty back suplex and some backbreakers. Ohtani checks back in and grabs a half-crab. Hamada grabs the ropes and tags Kanemoto back in. Kanemoto kicks some SERIOUS ass with vicious kicks and chops. Ohtani comes back with a scoop slam and tags Pegasus back in. They work a rapid-fire sequence, including Kanemoto countering a Wildbomb into a sunset flip, which leads to some pin reversals. Kanemoto caps that sequence off with a jumping back kick that sends Pegasus out of the ring. Benoit moves out of the way of a teased dive, and Kanemoto shows off with a top rope backflip. OMG stop with the gratuitous flips and LEARN TO WORK, DAMMIT!
Hamada re-enters with Ohtani and they do a GREAT little sequence that ends with Hamada grabbing a uranage and an armbar. Kanemoto and Hamada work the youngster over for a bit until Benoit tags back in. Hamada grabs a hurricanrana out of nowhere, but Benoit gets a quebradora. Wildbomb is countered with an armdrag, and we get some DIVES! Hamada with a plancha, followed by a BIG Ohtani springboard plancha, then Kanemoto with a plancha! Back in, Benoit and Ohtani leather each other with chops until one from Benoit knocks Koji on his ass. Ohtani comes in and counters a double wristlock with a somersault kick. Double kip-up!
Kanemoto dodges an Ohtani dropkick, then they start slapping the shit out of each other. Kanemoto tags Hamada in and works Ohtani over, but that doesn't last. Pegasus comes in and finally hits a Wildbomb on Hamada for two. Kanemoto comes in and HE eats a huge Wildbomb for two. Superplex from Pegasus…but Kanemoto GETS RIGHT BACK UP…and gets BLASTED by an Ohtani springboard dropkick out of absolute nowhere! Holy shit, that was masterful. Flying headbutt, but Hamada breaks up the pin. Ohtani comes in and grabs a German suplex for two! Kanemoto dodges a dropkick and brings in Hamada, who dodges a springboard dropkick and snags a ‘rana for two. DOOMSDAY MISSILE DROPKICK on Ohtani, then Kanemoto follows with a moonsault…but Benoit breaks up the pin.
Benoit tags in and immediately eats a German suplex. Hamada comes in for a back suplex for two. Ohtani and Kanemoto fight it out in the ring while Pegasus and Hamada wrestle. Ohtani goes for a huge plancha, but Kanemoto casually walks out of the way ala Samoa Joe! Hamada tries a leaping ‘rana, but Pegasus catches him with a big powerbomb for three! Kanemoto and Ohtani still beef for a bit after the bell.
****1/4 - This one featured a lot of great sequences and kept things moving at a good clip. Loved the disdain that Ohtani and Kanemoto had for each other. The early matwork was more engaging than usual because Ohtani and Kanemoto were being total dicks to each other, and they kept that energy throughout. Benoit brought the intensity and vicious snap to his moves, and Hamada added some lucha flavor to the match. I had a lot of fun watching this.
APRIL 15th
Oh, shit, here we go. A LOT happened on this day in the world of predetermined underpants fighting. Let’s get to it!
USWA Championship Wrestling - We're walkin’ in Memphis this week with some arena clips of Jerry Lawler vs. Bill Dundee. As promised, Tommy Rich is at ringside. They try to kick him out, but Rich HAS GOT A TICKET!
We clip to Dundee and Lawler beating the crap out of each other. Ref gets bumped (in Memphis? NEVER!) and Dundee gets KOed in the process. Rich jumps the railing and pushes Lawler on top of Dundee. Ref counts the fall for Lawler, ending the match at presumably 12 minutes, 48 seconds.
Dundee is PISSED and yanks Rich over the railing to beat his ass. Rich comes back with some chain shots (take a drink), busting him open.
We now kick it to Lance Russell at the studio, who brings out Bill “Superstar” Dundee for a chinwag. He runs down the recent events and his history with Tommy Rich, messing up his words along the way. He’s just so FIRED UP!
They have a First Blood match coming up, and Dundee promises to bust open that “bleach blonde pumpkin”. Said pumpkin comes out for a retort. He shouts about being the man, then they scrap for a bit until Rich powders.
Dundee says he wants a Loser Leaves Town cage match in addition to the First Blood match, then storms off.
Smoky Mountain Wrestling - We hit our second Saturday stop with some footage from a weekend of big shows from The Smoke. The first two matches were taped on 4/7 as part of Bluegrass Brawl III and broadcast on SMW's TV show on 4/15.
Smoky Mountain Wrestling Tag Team Championship, Coal Miner’s Glove match: Rock ‘n Roll Express (c) vs. The Dynamic Duo (Al Snow & Unabomb) - Oh, boy, Coal Miner’s Glove! One of the all-time infamous match stipulations due to the ungodly brainshart that was “Spin the Wheel, Make the Deal” from Halloween Havoc 1992. Essentially, said steel-laden glove is sat atop a pole and can be retrieved for use during the match. Unabomb is announced as “A Demon of Destruction”. Yeah, but is he the Devil's Favorite?
The Rock ‘n Roll Express get a huge pop coming out. Good to see that Pikeville knows ball. Gibson and Snow start off, which does not go well for Al. He dodges a couple of punches from both opponents but eats one from Robert and proceeds to flop like a fish for the sell. Ricky and Unabomb check in, and the idiot mayor gets the best of their exchange. Unabomb gets cocky, and Ricky stomps on his foot and SWEEPS THE LEG JOHNNY for a pin attempt.
The RnR fellas double-team both opponents, including a HUGE back body drop on Snow. We get a fun leapfrog sequence that ends with a Manhattan drop and a hilariously over-the-top pained sell by Snow. It's like when you shoot somebody in the junk in Goldeneye on the N64. Snow goes for the glove but gets crotched in the process. Those poor snow globes. Gibson and Unabomb come in, and Snow accidentally hits Unabomb multiple times! Unabomb teases clocking Snow, which the crowd wants to see, but it is not to be.
We clip to Snow and Gibson doing a criss-cross leading to another back body drop. We clip further in (announcer says we're at 20 minutes) as Snow and Unabomb work over Morton, the former of which using a chair. Ricky tries a comeback, but the future Kane cuts him off. Snow gets a superplex, then him and Unabomb land splashes for a two-count. Unabomb secures a (kind-of) upside-down Gory special, but Ricky sneaks in a punch to the penis, but Snow cuts off a potential tag. Some nice offense from the heels, including a butterfly suplex from Unabomb and a standing moonsault from Snow, but Gibson thwarts a top-rope moonsault attempt. Huge legdrop from Unabomb, BROTHER.
Ricky manages to escape a Dynamic Duo double-team, and it's HOT TAG GIBSON! The formula never fails, man. Robert runs wild on the heels until he is Irish-whipped into Snow. Morton and Unabomb go for the glove…and Morton grabs it! Off-camera, Snow decks Gibson with a foreign object and gets Gibson back in the ring. Morton clobbers Snow with the metal glove, but Snow ends up falling on top of the supine Gibson! Unabomb decks Morton, and the ref counts the pin! Snow and Unabomb win the titles!
I can't really rate it fairly because it was clipped, but this seemed about ***1/4-***1/2. Again, Morton is a GOAT babyface, selling his ass off and drawing sympathy as easily as most people grow hair. Gibson is always a great hot tag, Snow had some fun offense and great comedic selling, and the future dentist showed decent potential as a big boi bruiser. Fun finish, too. They didn't play into the stip all that much except for the finish, but since pole matches tend stink on ice, it may have been for the best.
Backstage, the Dynamic Duo cut a promo. Snow crows about winning the titles after 13 years of toil and vows to end the Rock ‘n Roll Express ONCE AND FOR ALL.
We then cut to the aftermath of The Gangstas vs. Tracy Smothers, The Undertaker & Bob Armstrong. The faces won the match (which was deemed TOO VIOLENT TO SHOW!), and, per the stipulation, The Gangstas have to salute the Confederate flag…
…Yes, they really had a stipulation where if the BABYFACES won, Black people would be forced to salute the Confederate flag. Fucking…yikes.
After a big melee, The Gangstas beat the shit out of everyone and spray-paint an ‘X’ on Bullet Bob.
Undertaker comes back and fights everyone off. Backstage, the faces cut a pissed-off promo on the Gangstas.
We then move onto footage from Fright Night, which occurred the night after Bluegrass Brawl III. We jump to the finish of ANOTHER Coal Miner's Glove match, this time being Ricky Morton vs. Unabomb. Morton climbs over a crotched Unabomb to snag the glove.
Unabomb falls off the topes and somehow bumps referee Mark Curtis on the way down! Morton socks Unabomb with the glove, but the ref is out! Al Snow comes in and hits an Arabian facebuster-like move on Morton with a chair, then lands a series of piledrivers, including one on the chair!
Since it's the South, where even one piledriver is treated like a direct blast from the Experimental MIRV (what’s with the Fallout 3 references, Ryan?), Ricky is a total corpse here. Snow places the glove onto Unabomb’s hand and places him on top of Morton. Robert Gibson FINALLY comes out, but Snow dives onto him to cut him off. The ref counts the pin for Unabomb.
Post-match, the ring announcer goes over the PA and asks for someone to call an ambulance as everyone is out to tend to Ricky. Ricky's girlfriend is in hysterics. Morton twitches and convulses while being attended to. Thanks, Pfizer. He’s loaded onto an ambulance as the commentator wonders if this is the end of his career (Ron Howard: “That was NOT the end of his career”).
We then get slow-motion replays of this attack, this time set to “American Pie” by Don McLean. Well, that’s certainly melodramatic.
Also on that show, a new SMW Heavyweight Champion was crowned as Buddy Landel defeated Bobby Blaze to take home the gold. Good for Buddy; he’d been one of the most consistently entertaining guys they had at the time.
WCW Saturday Night - We start off this week’s voyage aboard The Mothership with Tony Schiavone and Bobby Heenan. Heenan shows us a photo of Diamond Dallas Page, who apparently won $13 million in Vegas. Tony believes the photo is doctored. Lies! This looks completely legitimate!
We then cut to Dave “Evad” Sullivan who is recuperating from recent injuries. He gets a phone call from THE HULKSTER! I’d make fun of his room, but that would totally be my man cave (well, without the Hogan shit).
While assuring Hulk that he is indeed saying his prayers and taking his vitamins, a disguised Diamond Doll comes in and brings Evad a gift. This would turn out to be Ralph the Rabbit. Yes, she brought him a live rabbit in a shopping bag. Not in a cage or a carrier or anything. A goddamn shopping bag! This would lead to Evad falling in love with the Diamond Doll and kicking off a rather putrid feud with DDP.
We now join the WCW Executive Committee as Nick Bockwinkel introduces Hulk Hogan, Jimmy Hart, and Randy Savage to the meeting to plead their case to have Ric Flair reinstated.
Gary Juster (USA) and Tatiana DePaz (Spain) maintain their “no” votes. Our good buddy DIETER KRÄP (Germany) and Kensuke Ishikawa (Japan) keep their “yes” votes, but Christine LeBlanc (France) changes her vote to “yes” to break the deadlock! RIC FLAIR IS COMING BACK TO WCW!
Vader & Arn Anderson vs. Stars and Stripes (Marcus Bagwell & The Patriot) - That’s a pretty killer heel team, actually. Methinks ‘MURICA is in trouble here.
The fans chant “USA” to rally Bagwell and Patriot against the famously non-American Anderson and Vader. Arn and the future Buff start us off, with Arn complaining about a tights pull off an armdrag. They continue with the graps with Bagwell getting the upper hand. Patriot tags in and controls for a bit, dropkicking Arn off the apron. Back in, Bagwell and Arn trade sleepers, but Bagwell gets a backdrop before working over the arm. However, Arn dodges a dropkick, and Vader comes in and chokeslams the shit out of Bagwell. Great bump and sell from the youngster.
Vader officially tags in and pummels Bagwell for a bit. However, Bagwell manages a tag to Patriot, who hammers away at Vader, even clotheslining him down! Forearm off the ropes! Patriot charges into a boot from Vader, and a lariat takes him down! Arn checks back in, but Patriot uses the power of bald eagles and apple pie to fight back…until Vader avalanches him on the outside. The freshly reinstated Ric Flair comes out and cheers on his guys.
Arn distracts the ref, allowing Flair to choke Patriot. Patriot tries a sunset flip…but Arn tags Vader before going down, and Vader clobbers ol’ Del. Vader Bomb, but, after a delayed cover, Patriot kicks out! The timekeeper rings the bell, though, which is weird because the kickout was very obvious. Flair chokes Patriot out with his jacket, then the baddies continue their work, beating AMERICA down and cutting off comeback attempts. We get the traditional Anderson “bonking heads” spot, and HOT TAG BAGWELL! HOT DOGS! UNCLE SAM! Bagwell beats the turd out of Anderson and gets a powerslam for two! Patriot cuts Vader off with a back suplex and dispatch him with a double dropkick. Fisherman's suplex…but Vader headbutts Bagwell’s exposed midsection! Arn rolls Bagwell into a pin for the three (making sure to grab trunks like an all-time heel)!
Flair celebrates by stomping a foam Hogan souvenir.
***1/4 - That was a very enjoyable little TV match. The All-American boys (Stars and Stripes, not the Fabulous Rougeau Brothers) got some good shine in the beginning before Vader came in to wreck shit, but The Patriot kept up with him pretty well. The heels built up heat, we got a fun comeback from the faces, and the heels win in underhanded fashion. Good solid formula work.
The heels then cut a promo on Hogan and Savage. Flair goes insane, as usual.
GAEA Memorial First Gong - Welcome to the Dive, GAEA, and, well, welcome to professional wrestling as a whole! GAEA is a brand-spanking new joshi promotion founded by women’s wrestling legend Chigusa Nagayo. Initially announced in August 1994, GAEA is basically Nagayo, the recently poached-from-AJW KAORU, and a fresh crop of rookies trained by both ladies. One of those rookies would be future joshi legend and general badass Meiko Satomura, who was a mere 15 years old when she broke in.
The undercard for this show was mostly filled with rookie matches, but we have the main event featuring some guests from JWP.
Mayumi Ozaki & Devil Masami vs. Dynamite Kansai & Chigusa Nagayo - Well, that’s a hell of a match on paper. We got two top antagonists from JWP taking on JWP's ace and GAEA's big cheese.
Rivals Kansai and Ozaki start off hot with Kansai getting the best of that exchange. Masami and Chigusa tag in, with Masami getting double-teamed. Masami sits up during a pin attempt and lumbers around as she's going full Undertaker here.
Ozaki comes back in and gets double-teamed by the aces, including a nasty backbreaker. Spinning heel kick gets two for Nagayo, and she kicks some back! Ozaki scraps her way out and tags in Masami, who hits a kneeling piledriver (!) and a legdrop, BROTHER. Ozaki comes in and introduces the two most important words you will ever hear in your life: CHOKE CHAIN, pummeling Nagayo with it. I guess this is No DQ?
Kansai tags in, but SHE gets chained by the heels. Nagayo comes in with a chair to stop the double-team. Ozaki and Kansai are still chained, and Kansai grabs a HUGE backdrop driver! Nagayo locks on a sleeper as Kansai wards off Masami, but Ozaki doesn't give in. Masami tags in and her and Nagayo have a forehead battle until Nagayo grabs a sleeper. Ozaki takes back in and grapples with Nagayo, with Nagayo getting the upper hand. Ozaki manages a falling lariat and a German suplex, though.
Kansai comes back in, but Ozaki heel kicks her on the face and snags a Fujiwara armbar! Masami tags in, but her and Kansai lariat each other. Nagayo comes in and kicks some head, but Masami hits some axe kicks in retaliation. On the floor, Nagayo gets abused with the chain and some chairs for a bit. We go into the crowd as Masami leads her around via the chain around the neck. Masami then clobbers Nagayo in the head with several chairs, and Nagayo is BUSTED OPEN!
We finally get back to the ring as Masami continues to clobber Chigusa Moxley with the chain. Sleeper by Masami, but Nagayo backs into her corner, allowing Kansai to choke Masami…but Ozaki climbs up and chokes Kansai with the chain! It's like a totem pole of oxygen deprivation!
Nagayo catches Ozaki with a helicopter powerbomb! Kansai tags in, but misses a headbutt to Masami! BIG Powerbomb from Masami, but Kansai kicks out! Leg lariat off the top from Masami, but Nagayo breaks up the pin! Sleeper from Masami, but Kansai SWEEPS THE LEG JOHNNY and kicks Masami in the face! Zombie sit-up from Masami! Splash Mountain is thwarted by Ozaki, but she eats a backdrop driver! However, Ozaki comes back with the chain! Kansai is busted open, too! HOT TAG CHIGUSA…but Masami clobbers her from behind with the chain.
We brawl on the floor for a while as Nagayo and Masami clothesline each other down. Ozaki brings a table into the ring. Nagayo tries to powerbomb Ozaki through the table, but Ozaki ‘ranas out of it! Half-and-half suplex gets two! Ozaki powerbombs Nagayo onto the flattened table and Masami follows with a top rope legdrop, but Kansai breaks up the pin! Ozaki undoes the top rope as Kansai and Masami batter each other with chairs on the outside. Ozaki hits Nagayo with the wrench, but Nagayo comes back with a half-and-half suplex for two! Chair-assisted double-team powerbomb, but Masami breaks up the pin!
Kansai kicks the crap out of Ozaki and hits Splash Mountain, but Masami breaks up the pin with a plastic katana (?) and runs wild. Masami and Kansai tumble to the floor as Nagayo gets a gutwrench powerbomb…but Masami breaks up the pin from outside! Nagayo goes to powerbomb Ozaki on the floor, but Masami jabs Nagayo in the guts with the katana, allowing Ozaki to roll her up for three!
****1/4 - I was NOT expecting GAEA's ace to do the honors in the main event of the first show. This was wild as HELL, man. Ozaki as the crazy, scrappy brawler is tons of fun, and Masami is a great monster. Kansai and Nagayo brought the brutality. I liked it less than other matches some of these ladies had, though. It went quite a bit longer than needed (29 minutes), and there were definite slow periods and meandering segments. However, there was still a lot of intensity and chaos here.
AJPW Champion Carnival, Night 19 - Well, here it is, folks. After a long, grueling tournament, we’ve made it to the finals. Despite the houses being slightly down for most of the tour (likely attributed to Steve Williams’ absence), we have a sold-out Nippon Budokan for the finals.
Champion Carnival final: Mitsuharu Misawa vs. Akira Taue - Misawa is coming into this thing a hurting unit after breaking his orbital bone, while Taue is coming off a hell of a run in this tournament. As seen earlier in the week, these fellas battled to a time-limit draw in their round robin match. This has a tremendous big-fight atmosphere.
Crowd is AMPED as the bell rings. Taue gets a shoulderblock, but Misawa blocks Snake Eyes, and Taue blocks an elbow. They trade chops and elbows in the corner, then go into a crazy sequence where they counter each other's shit, ending in Taue slamming Misawa's injured face into the mat. Misawa powders, and Taue follows up with a SUICIDE DIVE! Taue is NOT fucking around tonight. Back in, Taue hits some short lariats to continue the abuse, but can't get the Nodowa. Misawa comes back with a twisting clothesline and applies the crossface…then Taue grabs one of his own! Move theft AND working over an injury in one move. That's good shit, pal!
Taue drops Misawa throat-first onto the ropes a couple of times, much to the great dislike of the crowd. Taue locks in the dragon sleeper for a bit, then goes for a suplex. Misawa escapes, but Taue clocks him with an elbow to the face and hits a DDT! Misawa ranas out of a powerbomb attempt and nails some kicks. Spinkick puts Taue out, and Misawa follows up with an elbow suicida. Back in, diving elbow gets two! Misawa lays in some elbows, but can't get a Tiger Driver. Misawa settles for a rolling elbow that separates Taue's soul from his body! Taue manages to kick out, then rolls outside to get his shit together after having it knocked apart.
Back in, Misawa gets two off a spinning back suplex, but can't get a tiger suplex. Misawa sets up another rolling elbow, but Taue counters this by clawing at Misawa's injured eye, then steps on his face! RUDE!
Taue drops Misawa face-first on the buckles to really be a dick, then follows with a dropkick to send Misawa outside. Misawa gets a desperation elbow on the outside but gets back-suplexed off the apron to the floor! The fans are willing Misawa back into things, and he blocks an apron Nodowa by smashing Taue with an elbow. Enzuigiri from Misawa back in the ring, and a frog splash gets two. German suplex gets a close two!
Tiger Driver gets two! Misawa escapes a vertical suplex by landing on the apron, but Taue strikes the eye…NODOWA OTOSHI TO THE FLOOR! Taue drags Misawa's limp body to the ring for a cover, but Misawa gets a rope break! Desperation rolling elbow, and Misawa rolls back out to the floor. Again, Taue drags Misawa’s lifeless husk back into the ring and hits a HUGE release German for a VERY CLOSE two! Taue hits the DYNAMIC BOMB…for two!
The crowd is coming unglued! Misawa hits some desperation elbows, and Taue retaliates by stomping Misawa’s face. Misawa NAILS another couple of elbows and rolls back to the floor to buy time. Taue gets him back in the ring and preps a top rope Nodowa…but Misawa armdrags out of it! Rolling elbow…but Taue counters a Tiger Driver! More elbows! Release German from Misawa, and Tiger Driver…GETS TWO! Taue goes to the orbital bone again, but Misawa keeps coming with the elbows! Tiger suplex gets two! Another one puts Taue down! Mitsuharu Misawa is your Champion Carnival winner!
***** - What an EPIC war this was. Rarely do you see Misawa as desperate and vulnerable as you see him here. Dude was fighting for his life out there against a ruthless and relentless Taue. Incredible storytelling throughout and some absolutely insane near falls near the end. The strikes, moves, and psychology were all on point here. I loved that Misawa used his elbows; he threw a lot of them, but they were to keep Taue at bay, and he knew they were his most effective offense. This sucker kept building and building, whipping the crowd (and myself) into a frenzy and ending with a well-earned conclusion.
A lot of people consider this to be Taue's greatest performance, and some consider to be Misawa's. I won't argue with either assessment. I watched this nearly 20 years ago on a compilation and remember enjoying it. However, it's so much more satisfying when you get the tournament stuff leading up to it. This has to be the best match I've seen so far since I started this series.
ECW Hostile City Showdown ‘95 - To close out one hell of a week, we have some choice matches from ECW's latest supercard. We kick it off with Joey Styles interviewing Raven, Stevie Richards, and Beulah McGillicutty. After Joey sneaks in a Village People joke about Stevie's attire, Stevie runs down the recent events between the group and Tommy Dreamer. He explains the Dreamer/Raven LORE that stems from summer camp, focusing on Dreamer treating Beulah like crap because she was (at the time) allegedly 320lbs and acne-ridden.
Only Raven and Stevie treated her with respect. Richards promises that Raven will CRUCIFY Dreamer!
Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven - Raven springs to life and dives onto Dreamer while he's making his entrance. Raven puts Dreamer through a wall and through a door near the back of the arena, and Dreamer is busted open already! A Raven piledriver attempt near the crow’s nest is thwarted by Dreamer, and Raven is placed onto a table. Dreamer follows with a chair to the face and a suplex on the bare floor. They continue brawling around the arena for a bit.
Dreamer dinks Raven a few times with a literal kitchen sink, then Raven bops Dreamer with it. Back in, Dreamer gets a sleeper (!), but they tumble to the floor. Dreamer grabs a plastic toy dinosaur and just REX Raven’s nards with it. Get it? Like ‘wrecks’, but ‘Rex’ because dinosaur?
Anyhoo, Dreamer then gets a dozen eggs and smashes them into Raven’s face. If that happened today, that many eggs would use up the show’s production budget. How fowl! Back in, Raven scores a series of DDTs, but Dreamer kicks out! On the floor, Raven tries another one, but Dreamer kicks him in his allegedly hefty wiener and DDTs HIM on the floor! In the ring, Dreamer covers, but Stevie breaks the pin! Joey wonders where the DQ is, but this is ECW, man! Dreamer DDTs Stevie, then referee John Finnegan! Beulah comes in, and Dreamer PILEDRIVES her…
…I'll let you make your own joke here.
Philly is RABIDLY into the man-on-woman violence as Dreamer celebrates in the crowd. The match is thrown out.
**1/2 - This was a brief, silly brawl with a non-finish. Not much in the way of structure or selling here. Just some brawling, goofy weapon spots, and DDTs aplenty, but it was still pretty entertaining. Dreamer gets one up on Raven and company but doesn't get an actual win over his childhood rival.
ECW World Television Championship: Eddy Guerrero (c) vs. Dean Malenko - Well, this will certainly be a change of pace from the last match and, well, pretty much anything else on the show. We get some PRIMO graps to start things off, with great matwork and reversals. Dean takes over with some boots, then Guerrero comes back with an eyepoke and a bootscrape. We then get a crazy-ass reversal/parity sequence, ending with traded headscissors and a double-dropkick. This stalemate gets a great reaction from the normally vampiric ECW crowd.
Joey declares that wrestlers of this caliber going all-out and competing for a major title will NEVER happen elsewhere. Eric Bischoff heard this and was like “Bet”. Malenko works over the leg, but Guerrero goes for an armbar to counter and finally locks in a jujigatame. Malenko tries to escape but ends back up in a precarious position. Malenko gets the ropes and we hit the KNUCKLELOCK! GREAT bridge from Malenko, then Guerrero flips out of it and nails a uranage, then a hilo.
Malenko breaks the pin with a foot on the ropes. Guerrero gets a chinlock, but Malenko fights out and grabs a butterfly suplex for two. Malenko holds onto the arm as Eddy kicks out and works an armbar for a bit. Dean gets a dropkick to the knee and gets a crazy surfboard/leg grapevine combo that earns some two-counts.
Malenko abuses the leg in relentless fashion. He grabs a nasty legbar, but Eddy makes the ropes. Dean continues destroying the knee. He gets another legbar, which Eddy tries to counter…but Dean smoothly transitions into an STF variant! Guerrero makes the ropes and rolls up Malenko for two. Guerrero hits a fisherman's suplex, but can't keep the pin because of the leg. Guerrero gets a powerbomb for two! Tornado DDT gets some close near-falls as Eddy keeps going for the cover. Top rope Frankensteiner, but Eddy is too hurt to quickly follow up. Guerrero goes for a surfboard, then works it into a version of what would become the Lasso from El Paso! Hey, Eddy! This move sucks!
Eddy transitions into his own STF, but quickly releases it. Guerrero gets some European uppercuts, but Malenko hits the ten-count punches. Eddy grabs Dean and places him on the top rope and pushes him, but Dean hooks Eddy with his legs to send BOTH tumbling out! They battle on the apron, which ends with Malenko suplexing Guerrero from the ring to the floor! Dean attempts a pescado, but Eddy simply moves out of the way. Guerrero dives off the top and onto Malenko! Nasty landing for Guerrero as Malenko didn't quite catch him. That earns an “OH MY GOD!” from Joey.
Back in, Malenko drills Eddy with a brainbuster for two. Guerrero gets his OWN brainbuster and nails the frog splash…for two! Northern Lights suplex from Malenko (with a hook of the leg!) gets two. Malenko goes for a Texas Cloverleaf, but Guerrero grabs the ropes. Dean gets a double underhook powerbomb and goes for the cloverleaf again, but Eddy grabs a roll-up for two! Guerrero gets a ‘rana off the ropes for another two! Pumphandle backbreaker gets some two counts! Eddy gets the Gory special and that turns into another insane pinfall sequence! Sunset flip powerbomb from Eddy gets two! The bell rings! WE HAVE A DRAW (well, in reality, the bell rang close to 26 minutes)!
****3/4 - This was absolutely fantastic technical wrestling. Both guys wrestled with purpose, putting snap into their moves and hitting everything with impeccable execution. The mat wrestling was lovely, with crisp counters and transitions. I loved the attention to detail, like Eddy going for multiple pin attempts after big moves. Just top-shelf psychology here. Malenko was a great diabolical technician, and he is always so effortlessly smooth. Other than a bit of inconsistency with Eddy’s selling of the leg late in the match, this was state-of-the-art stuff for 1995, especially in America, and it holds up quite well today. One of the top matches in ECW history. Loved this shit.
We now join the ECW World Heavyweight Championship match between Shane Douglas (c) and The Sandman in progress. Sandy works over Shane for a bit but misses a top rope legdrop. Douglas comes back with a terrible backbreaker and a standing dropkick.
Douglas locks in the crossface chicken wing, but Woman whacks him in the leg with the cane. There was some teased dissention after 3 Way Dance between Sandman and Woman, so this was meant to be a swerve. Sandman falls on top while Shane keeps the hold on…and the ref counts three! The Sandman wins the ECW title! The crowd loves it, but that was an aggressively stupid way for Shane to lose the belt after 385 days. The action shown before the bell was pretty lousy, too.
Shane loses his rag after the match, throwing shit around and putting on a Monday Night RAW t-shirt. He says he is going to where he can WRESTLE and tells the crowd to kiss his ass.
Cactus Jack vs. Terry Funk - The Funker takes off his entrance poncho to reveal a shirt that says “CACTUS MY ASS” written on the back. That's either a statement of his feelings on Mick Foley, or a very painful request.
Cactus goads Funk into brawling in the crowd to start, but Funk goes into a different part of the crowd. Jack chases him to the crow’s nest area, but Funk gets the early advantage with some chairshots. They crawl up to the commentary area, where Funk just tosses chairs at Cactus! Cactus retorts with a nasty chair to the head.
Funker ends up on the table but moves out of the way when Jack attempts an elbow! They brawl back to ringside where Funk continues to clobber Foley with the chair. Cactus comes back with various weapons (crutch, cookie sheet, frying pan), but Terry starts demolishing Jack's leg (and other areas) with a chair. Funk brings a table into the ring but gets thrown into it a couple times. On the outside, Jack grabs a toilet seat from the crowd and horse-collars Funk with it!
Jack goes to the second rope, but Funk bonks him on the bum leg with a chair and tosses Jack to the bare concrete below! Good grief! They brawl to the back area where Jack finds a garbage container, which he tosses into the ring. Jack proceeds to WASTE Funk with it. Get it? “Wastes”? Like garbage?
Funk finds a beer bottle and breaks it over Jack's head (after three attempts! Ouch!), then dumps the refuse over him. Funk then carves into Jack's arm, chest, and forehead with the broken bottle! Yikes. After some more mauling, Funk fights off Mikey Whipwreck and Hack Meyers, who try to intervene. Funk then smashes Foley's leg with the chair a few times and grabs the spinning toehold, but Jack rolls him up for two! DDT on the chair from Cactus! Sandman then runs in and canes Funk by mistake as the ref rings the bell! Jack gets another sloppy DDT and pins Funk.
It looked like Sandman blew the finish as he was supposed to attack Jack after he pinned Funk, but Sandy jumped the gun and hit the ring before the three. This resulted in the finish having to be redone on the fly.
**3/4 - I liked this one for the most part. It feels a bit same-y when you have other guys doing this style of match up and down the card, but this was at least intense, sick, and chaotic, and the attempted psychology with Jack’s leg was appreciated. It kinda ran out of steam after a while, though, and the finish was an ungodly mess.
Post-match, Sandman canes Jack repeatedly and pours lighter fluid on him. Oh, shit, Funk brings out the flaming branding iron!
Funk blows fire into Jack's face, but Jack thankfully stops the impending immolation and chases the Funker off.
I gotta say, we got some STINKY finishes on that show. When the best finish you have out of four matches is a time-limit draw, that’s pretty bad.
If you’re still here after all of that, THANK YOU! I question your sanity, but I’m eternally grateful. Seriously, if I named these articles like Friends episodes, this would be “The One With The Time Limit Draws”.
What a goddamn week that was. Three time-limit draws, two other matches that neared 30 minutes, and a bunch of other matches to boot. I shouldn’t have to tell you to watch the shit out of that Champion Carnival final match and Guerrero/Malenko. Two of the most-loved matches from this time period happening on opposite sides of the globe on the same day. That NJPW juniors match was also incredibly fun.
NEXT TIME: It will be a much lighter week (THANK GOD), but we’ll still have a couple of matches from New Japan, one of which features two competitors from the earlier juniors tag. We’ll have an installment of one of the great lucha feuds from around this time, and we’ll have our first non-Bridge of Dreams look at UWFi. Plus, the usual Saturday stuff.
See you (hopefully) soon!