Ryan Navigates '90 - #21 (WrestleMania VI!)

"I'm gonna ask you, 'Do you want to live forever?', and if your answer is 'yes', Ultimate Warrior, then breathe your last breath into my body!"

Good day!

This issue is going to be a bit different than the typical article as I’m doing the entirety of a single show. As with Ryan’s Dive into ‘95, I’ll sometimes review full shows if they’re historically significant, or if I just feel like it.

As such, let’s get into the BIG ONE for the year: WWF WrestleMania VI!

WrestleMania VI is a show I have a lot of nostalgia for. While it’s not one that I watched at the time (as I didn’t start watching until 1991), it’s one of the first wrestling VHS tapes I borrowed from the library. I’ve seen this show a LOT, and I’ve always had a good time, even if it’s not necessarily a top-tier ‘Mania from a quality perspective. It’s a solid ‘chicken soup’ kind of show.

The sixth Showcase of the Immortals comes to YOU from the SkyDome in Toronto, Ontario, in front of what the WWF claimed to be 67,678 strong. The real number, according to Dave Meltzer, is closer to 64,000, but it’s still a buttload of people who watched wrestling on April 1st. It wasn’t a sellout, but the live attendance was still a success.

Financially, though, the show is looked at as a true disappointment. WrestleMania VI garnered 550,000 PPV buys, down from the 767,000 generated by WrestleMania V the year prior, and it did rather poorly in closed-circuit locations. There are a few reasons that are often cited for the fiscal letdown:

• The show cost more than other WWF PPVs had to that point, at a steep $29.95 USD.

  • In 2024 money, that amounts to about eleventy bajillion dollars, or ~$72.33 if you were to assign a real number.

• The all-good guy main event, coupled with the lack of a big angle on any of the TV, didn’t generate the level of conflict necessary to compel more viewers to buy the show.

• The PROMOS. Dear GOD, the promos. I can’t imagine too many small children heard Warrior telling Hogan to hijack a goddamn plane and begging their parents to call their local cable company.

Despite the decrease, the 550K buys from WrestleMania VI would remain the highest number of purchases for ANY WWF PPV until WrestleMania XIV in 1998.

I don't have a working VCR or the WWE Network handy, so the version I'm watching is from the big-ass WrestleMania Anthology box set that was released in 2005 (that I bought on Ring of Honor’s website, oddly enough). Sadly, because of legal/petty bullshit at the time, several of the theme songs have been dubbed over. Boo, hiss!

• In the pre-show dark match, Paul Roma defeated The Brooklyn Brawler.

The constellation intro is still EPIC AS HELL.

We then cut to that CLASSIC WrestleMania intro song. I love The Weeknd and all, but that old-school ‘Mania theme was the Good Shit.

Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura. This is the final WrestleMania with that combination in the booth as Ventura would leave the WWF later in the year. I’ll dig into what happened with more detail when we reach that period in the Navigation, but it wasn’t exactly on the best of terms.

Robert Goulet, future Naked Gun 2 1/2 star and beleaguered piano player from “Weird Al” Yankovic’s “You Don’t Love Me Anymore” music video, sings “O Canada”.

After being whipped into a frenzy by the raw, animalistic power of Robert Goulet, Toronto is READY for some graps.

“The Model” Rick Martel vs. “The Birdman” Koko B. Ware

RING CARTS, BABY! If my wife is reading this: when I die, all I ask is that my taxidermized corpse is driven around town in one of those.

I enjoy Koko because whenever someone posts a GIF of him online, it will either be the gnarliest brainbuster you’ll ever see, or a ridiculously good missile dropkick where he lands on his feet.

Martel attacks Koko during the pre-match weapons check, but Ware hits a rebound crossbody and a couple of dropkicks, then a clothesline to put the Model on the floor. Koko slingshots the Model back in and hits a shoulderblock, but Martel hurls him out of the ring to gain the upper hand.

Martel continues to pound away at Koko, including a second-rope axehandle and a backbreaker. He attempts the Boston Crab, but The Birdman wriggles his way to the ropes. Martel rams Koko’s head into the turnbuckle, but that turns out to be a mistake because, according to WWF logic, all Black wrestlers have hard heads. Koko fights back with some punches and a pair of flying headbutts (and a fakeout) for two.

Koko tries another rebound crossbody, but Martel ducks this time. Boston Crab gets the submission win for The Model.

*3/4 - While it’s no Bret/Owen from WrestleMania X, this was a pleasantly simple, well-paced little opener between a couple of highly enjoyable workers. Martel gets the win to remain in the midcard picture, while Koko is largely relegated to the “Jobber to the Stars” role.

“Mean” Gene Okerlund is backstage with The Colostomy Colossal Connection. Bobby “The Brain” Heenan takes exception to Gene’s misnomer while Haku and André the Giant promise to ELIMINATE Demolition.

Sean Mooney has Demolition with them. Ax, living up to his name, promises to chop down Haku and André, yelling “TIIIMMMMBEEEERRRR!” as they fall. Smash wants to throw the Colossals in the back of a semi tractor trailer and drive them off a cliff. I’ve always greatly enjoyed Demolition; they’re great talkers with a killer look and incredible entrance music. Immaculate vibes.

WWF Tag Team Championship: The Colossal Connection (André the Giant & Haku) (c) vs. Demolition (Ax & Smash)

The Colossal Connection don’t even get an entrance, which doesn’t exactly bode well for their chances here.

Rick Derringer’s kick-ass Demolition theme has been overdubbed here with generic royalty-free rock, which is an absolute TRAVESTY.

The baddies attack to start, but the Demos fight back to work over Haku. Ax chops away before tagging Smash in for some punishment. Him and Haku fight over a backslide, which Smash gets before André comes in to break it up. Ax checks back in and eats a karate thrust to the throat for his efforts. Haku gets a backbreaker and holds onto it for a pin attempt.

Haku lands a thrust kick and continues to beat Ax's ass, letting Heenan and André get some dastardly shots in. After a clobbering, Ax tries to fight back, but Haku cuts that off. The fans rally behind Ax, but Big Dré strangles him with the tag rope.

Haku snuffs out another comeback bid and hits a shoulderbreaker for a near-fall. However, a Haku blind charge hits knees, Ax hits a lariat, and it's HOT TAG SMASH! Smash goes to town on Haku with a huge back bodydrop, then the Demos double-clothesline André! After a bit of chaos, Haku accidentally thrust-kicks André! The Giant's tied up in the ropes, allowing Demolition to hit a double stun gun and the Demolition Decapitation on Haku for the three and the belts!

** - Not a bad match all in all, despite André’s severe health limitations requiring Haku to wrestle most of the match by his lonesome. The formula was still worked well, Demolition’s comeback was fun, and the crowd was super into it.

Post-match, Heenan turns on André, poking the gigantic French bear and earning a thrashing as a result. He then catches a Haku thrust kick and beat the hell out of him, too! He yanks them out of the ring cart, takes it for himself, and gets a rather nice reaction from the Toronto fans as he makes his way to the back.

This would have been a nice career capper for André, but he’d still wrestle and make appearances after this. In fact, he’ll face Demolition again in under two weeks at the Tokyo Dome.

Earthquake and Jimmy Hart tell us that the seismometer will reflect an earthquake in Toronto!

Earthquake vs. Hercules

Again, Earthquake looks way too nice in that graphic to be a monster heel, probably because he was a ridiculously nice guy IRL. It’s the damn smile eyes.

I've always liked Herc. Not an all-time great worker or anything, but he was a big, dumb, fun musclehead.

Herc dodges an avalanche to start and continues sticking and moving until Jimmy Hart distracts him on the apron. Quake bails for an ad-hoc meeting with The Mouth of the South, then we get a test of strength that looks initially bleak for The Mighty Hercules.

After the fans will Hercules back into it, Quake kicks him in the gut and continues clobbering away. Hercules comes back with some clubbing of his own and a few shoulderblocks and clotheslines. Quake’s on one knee, so Hercules goes for the Argentine backbreaker. That is SO not happening, dude, and Quake indeed fights out and drops some big elbows. The Earthquake buttsplash gets the three.

Post-match, Earthquake delivers the Aftershock, basically another buttsplash, to his felled opponent.

** - This was a brief, but fun, little bout that did everything it needed, mainly getting Quake a definitive win against a bigger guy, in stature and in name. The big lads worked quite well together, and Herc’s quick start and fiery comeback were well-executed. I like his punches.

Earthquake drew several “ooohhs” from the crowd during the match, an encouraging sign for a monster heel being groomed for a main-event run.

Gossip columnist Rona Barrett spills some tea with Miss Elizabeth.

Rona asks her why she’s been absent from ringside, and Elizabeth says she doesn’t want to disappoint anyone by not being able to do enough out there. She pledges to do more when she returns to ringside.

Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake yaks about Mr. Perfect’s perfect resume, but everybody is flawed. He promises to blemish Mr. Perfect’s spotless win-loss record, even though The Ultimate Warrior already did that a couple of weeks ago.

Brutus “The Barber” Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect

As with many babyfaces, Beefcake is over as hell with the fans. Jesse, in a roundabout way, says hi to “Terry, Tyrel, and Jade in Minneapolis”, which was a bit of a WrestleMania tradition.

Both guys exchange blows before Beefcake launches Perfect to the floor with a punch. Back in, Beefcake gets a high knee and an atomic drop to send Perfect again flying to the floor. After a brief conference with The Genius, Perfect comes back in and takes over with punches and chops until Beefcake hurls Perfect into the corner for another huge bump.

Beefer continues pounding away until Genius hits the apron for a distraction, slipping the metal poetry scroll into the ring in the process. Perfect procures it and wallops Brother Bruti.

Perfect gets a sustained advantage with stomps and the Perfect necksnap (with fans holding up “10” cards at ringside). Perfect stomps, punches, and kneelifts the Barber, then slaps and shoves him around for fun. Perfect continues playing with his food until Beefcake suddenly snatches him with a catapult into the ringpost! Perfect is out cold, and Beefcake covers for the pin!

Post-match, Beefer teases a haircut on Perfect, but Genius steals the hedgeclippers. Beefcake catches him and ends up putting him in the sleeper. The Barber then de-mullets the former Leapin’ Lanny.

**1/4 - Not a bad midcard match as Perfect was game to bump around like nuts, and Brutus was in that brief window where he was a perfectly cromulent worker. I’m not normally a fan of the catapult move, but Perfect’s bump into the ringpost was awesome enough to make it a worthy finish.

The unexpected win for Beefcake was apparently supposed to set up a SummerSlam program between the two for the Intercontinental title, but those plans were curtailed by Brutus shattering his face into a billion pieces in the infamous parasailing accident on July 4th.

We’re presented with clips of the grudge between Rowdy Roddy Piper and Bad News Brown, then we get another Piper promo in half-blackface. He refers to the Black side as “The Hot Scot” in contrast to his normal “Hot Rod” persona, then makes fun of Brown’s bug-eyes, dilated nostrils, and nosehair. I love Piper, I really do, but this was a pretty lousy promo, even when you discount the blackface.

Rowdy Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

Bad News gets the “currently in the ring” treatment. Piper infamously wrestles the full match with half of his entire body painted black, like a racist Harvey Dent. Jesse points out that Brown is upset. I mean, can you BLAME HIM?!?

As is the theme for the night, both guys fight before the opening bell (though I don’t think it rang for this match, actually). Hot Rod gets a crossbody for two before referee Danny Davis separates the two. Bad News takes over with some punching and a headbutt, then rams him into the turnbuckle. Piper teases firing up, but Brown cuts him off and gets a nervehold.

Piper fights out and we brawl a bit more until Brown gets a fistdrop for two. Moments later, Piper gets an eyepoke and unloads with fists in the corner, but Brown pays him back by raking the eyes. Brown removes the turnbuckle pad, but in a truly ironic twist, gets whipped into it himself! Piper reaches in and grabs a white glove to put over his black fist, then drops Bad News with it a few times.

Piper knocks Brown out of the ring, and we brawl to a double count-out. Despite this and the efforts of the referees and agents, the guys continue fighting to the back.

1/2* - Yeah, this just didn’t work. Aside from the blackface stuff, the match never got into gear. For two talented workers, this was pedestrian at best before the lousy finish.

This match and Piper’s promo preceding it were actually removed from the Peacock version of the show.

In the acoustically rich bathroom, former Tonight Show host Steve Allen tickles some ivories while rehearsing the Soviet national anthem with The Bolsheviks.

Allen plays some Soviet-related parodies to piss them off, then someone flushes a toilet to close things out. Volkoff has to be held back by Zhukov from going apeshit.

This was actually pretty funny, with Boris and especially Nikolai selling this tremendously.

Allen does have some history with wrestling, getting his television start in 1949 by announcing pro wrestling matches. He also narrated the Unreal History of Pro Wrestling documentary that aired a bunch of times on A&E in 1999.

The Hart Foundation (Bret “Hitman” Hart & Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart) vs. The Bolsheviks (Nikolai Volkoff & Boris Zhukov)

The Hart Foundation already made a challenge to the WWF tag champs, so it’s not like the result here is in doubt.

The Harts attack the Soviets as they’re singing the national anthem. Rude! Hart Attack on Zhukov gets the pin in under 20 seconds for an easy WrestleMania payday. Next!

We get a commercial for WrestleMania VII, set to take place in the L.A. Coliseum in 1991 and breaking attendance records in the process!

Yeeaaaaahhhhhhh, about that…

Tito Santana vs. The Barbarian

Barbie is fresh off of the split with The Warlord and is now being managed by Bobby Heenan. He’s got the fur, but not the antlers and furry boots.

Backstage, Tito praises the Barbarian as a great physical specimen. He’ll keep his eyes on both Barbie and the Brain, then promises to survive. ARRIBA!

Barbarian asserts his power, but Tito uses his quickness and his fists to send the Barbarian on the floor for a coaching session from Bobby. Back in, Barbarian throws his weight around, but Tito again dodges his blows and hits a crossbody for two. Barbarian biels Santana with a hiptoss, but Tito dodges a headbutt and gets a series of punches out of a hurricanrana attempt for a two-count. Back up, Tito runs into a huge boot and eats a shoulderbreaker.

Barb goes for the Elbowdrop That Always Misses, which misses. Tito makes a comeback, finally felling the big man after a couple of dropkicks. An axehandle and the flying forearm put the Barbarian down…but Heenan puts Barbarian’s foot on the rope! Santana tries a roll-up, but Barbarian runs his throat into the ropes, then comes off the top with a HUGE clothesline for the three! Tito landed on his noggin with that one.

**1/4 - Another very compact, but fun, match. This was actually more competitive than the complete slaughter I remember it being. Barbarian is clumsy and awkward, but his stuff looks brutal. Tito got some nice hope spots in while still making Barbarian look like an absolute murderer with his bumping. Awesome finish, too.

We see a video recap of the events leading up to the Mixed Tag match. Dusty Rhodes tells Sean Mooney that him and Sapphire will CROWN the Macho King and Queen Sherri. Dusty then claims they have the CROWN JEWELS, which confuses Mr. Mooney.

Mixed Tag Team Match: “Macho King” Randy Savage & Sensational Queen Sherri vs. Dusty Rhodes & Sapphire

The first Mixed Tag in WrestleMania history, it’s guys vs. guys and ladies vs. ladies. Savage and Sherri are looking fucking REGAL, guys. Sherri especially ATE with that robe.

The monsters at the legal department stripped “Common Man Boogie” from Dusty and Sapphire’s entrance. I miss fan signs that were dot matrix-printed, complete with tractor holes.

Dusty gets under Savage’s skin by introducing the crown jewel…MISS ELIZABETH! She gets a pretty nice response from the fans as Savage goes ballistic.

The gents open things up, with Dusty getting the early advantage with them elbows. Sherri comes in to blindside Dusty, but Sapphire puts a stop to that. Dusty catches Savage in mid-air and tosses him into Sherri! Sapphire tags in as Dusty hurls Sherri back into the ring. Sapphire bumps Sherri into Savage, then dominates with some butt butts. Sherri tries a slam, but Sapphire proves to be too much woman, collapsing on top of her for a near-fall.

The men check back in, resulting in Dusty holding Macho in place for a Sapphire slap (Slapphire?).

Sherri tries to intervene, but gets Savage tossed at her in response. Dusty backs Sherri into the corner, allowing Savage to knee him from behind to send him outside. Macho King unloads with rights, then distracts the ref so that Sherri can get some shots in. Savage gets a couple of axehandles to the floor, with Sherri getting more illegal offense in between. Sapphire shields The American Dream from another one, so Savage tosses her aside and hits an axehandle in the ring and a vertical suplex, each for a two.

Behind the ref’s back, Savage clobbers Dream with the scepter, then Sherri tags in for a splash for two as the rules are pretty much out the window at this point. Savage tries another attack, but Dusty intercepts with a fist to the breadbasket, then rams his opponent’s heads together.

Rhodes continues the beating with bionic elbows until Sherri jumps on his back again. Sapphire tags in and yanks Sherri off, then they grab hair until Saph hurls Sherri out of the ring. Elizabeth tosses her back in to a BIG pop, then hits a quasi-DDT for a two (with Savage breaking up the pin). Things quickly break down until Sapphire rolls Sherri up with a schoolboy for three (with an assist from Elizabeth)!

Post-match, all the babyfaces dance!

**1/4 - Honestly, this could have been much worse, even if they did play fast and loose with the rules. Savage and Sherri provided some A-grade clowning, and the men worked well together. I didn’t necessarily care for the Sapphire portions, but the fans ate it up, and they were kept blessedly brief. The Elizabeth stuff added an extra layer of drama, too.

Intermission!

It’s intermission time! Take a whiz, light up a dart, microwave a Hot Pocket, crack open a Labatt's Blue, whatever. In the meantime, here’s the same WrestleMania VII ad we saw earlier! Remember, new attendance records will be set!

OK, stop laughing.

Mean Gene chats with a sweaty Bobby Heenan, who’s ranting against André the Giant.

“YOU LISTEN TO ME, YOU GO TO THE TOP! DON’T LISTEN TO ME, YOU’RE NEVER HEARD FROM AGAIN!”

He bitches about André not getting in the ring during the match before storming off in a significant huff. It feels like they filmed this before the Barbarian match because he looked much more together then.

Gorilla and Jesse talk to Rona Barrett, who claims to know about an “adult feature” starring The Body. Before they can roll X-rated footage on a family-friendly wrestling PPV, Jesse throws it to Sean Mooney, Macho King, and Sherri.

Savage and Sherri yell, with Savage howling that SUFFERIN’ BUILDS CHARACTER before directing more threats at Dusty Rhodes. Sherri screams.

Mean Gene brings in the NEW WWF tag champs, Demolition. They’re happy about their third tag team titles, with this win being the sweetest as they weren’t the odd-on favorites this time. The Hart Foundation is next for the champs.

Alright, here it is, our final promo battle between Hogan and Warrior before the big match. These are probably two of the more infamous promos in WrestleMania history. First, Mean Gene is with Hulk Hogan. Here’s a transcript I found because any attempted description will do this shit absolutely zero justice:

“You know something Mean Gene?!? You don't have to remind me and my Hulkamaniacs that at SkyDome, we're gonna face the ultimate challenge, BROTHER! When we crossed the border from the United States of America to Canada, I was hovering over SkyDome, brother! I saw what was beneath me, man! I saw the greatest arena of all times, where the Ultimate Challenge will take place, and as we landed brother, nothing but stark raving Hulkamaniacs were there to greet me at the airport. Nothing but positive vibes, man! Hulkamania is running wild like it's never ran before, but the Ultimate Warrior, you must realize that when you step into SkyDome, when you feel the energy that's gonna run wild throughout the arena, those are my people!

That's my energy, brother, and Ultimate Warrior, THIS is where the power lies, man, and the power of the Hulkster, the largest arms in the world, and once I get you down on your knees Ultimate Warrior, I'm gonna ask you one question, brother!

I'm gonna ask you, "Do you want to live forever?", and if your answer is "yes", Ultimate Warrior, then breathe your last breath into my body! I can save ya! My Hulkamaniacs can save ya! We can turn the darkness that you live in into the light! We can save all your little Warriors with the training, the prayers, and the vitamins, but I gotta prove one thing to all my Hulkamaniacs out there.

It's not whether you win or whether you lose! The only thing that matters is what kind of winner you are, or what kind of loser you are, and Ultimate Warrior, I sure hope you're a good loser, BROTHER! Whatcha gonna do in SkyDome, when the largest arms in the world and Hulkamania destroys yooouuuu?!”

Yup. The “H” in “Jesus H. Christ” apparently stands for “Hulk”.

Sean Mooney tries to interview the Ultimate Warrior, but he’s immediately accosted and tossed aside as he’s NOTHING BUT A NORMAL who doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air as Warrior and Hogan! Geez, dude. Again, here’s a transcript:

“HO KOGAN, I must ask you now as you asked me: do you, HO KOGAN, want your ideas, your beliefs to live forever? For, HO KOGAN, in this normal world, physically none of us can live forever, but the places you have taken the Hulkamaniacs, the ideas and beliefs that you have given them can live through me, HO KOGAN.

That is why I breathe. That is why the Warriors have come. HO KOGAN, there are ones that question where you are taking them. Do you no longer want to walk or step into that darkness? HO KOGAN, the darkness I speak of is nothing of fear. It is about the beliefs...of accepting any and all challenges at the cost of losing everything, HO KOGAN. YOU HAVE LIVED, HO KOGAN, for the last five Wrestlemanias for this one belief. Now, HO KOGAN, I come to take what you believe in further then you ever could.

I come, HO KOGAN, not to destroy the Hulkamaniacs and Hulkamania. I come, HO KOGAN, to bring the Warriors and Hulkamaniacs together as one as we, HO KOGAN, accept all the challenges with all the strengths of the WARYAHS and the Hulkamaniacs together. HO KOGAN, the colors of the Hulkamaniacs are coming through the pores of my skin...and HO KOGAN, when we meet, HO KOGAN, I will look at you and you will realize then that I have come to do no one no harm, but only, HO KOGAN, to take what we both believe in to places it shall never have been!”

Okie dokie.

Honestly, even though I was just… fucking DONE with these, they definitely saved some true messianic nuttery for the last ones. They’re back to being somewhat entertaining as a result.

The Rockers (Shawn Michaels & Marty Jannetty) vs. The Orient Express (Sato & Tanaka)

According to legend (and Shawn himself, apparently), the Rockers were still fucked up after a night of hard partying, so they’re working a bit inhibited.

Holy crap, not even the stereotypical music that the WWF used for every Japanese wrestler, from Bull Nakano to Takeshi Morishima, is safe from the overdubbing overlords.

Marty and Tanaka kick things off, with some punches being exchanged until Tanaka gets a thrust kick. After a bit of Orients double-teaming, Jannetty gets a powerslam, then the Rockers double-team both guys, culminating in a double press slam and stereo planchas. After things settle down a bit, Mr. Fuji yanks the top rope, allowing Marty to fall to the floor and into an attack from Sato.

Back in, the Express chop and kick Marty until he flips out of a back body drop and tags in Shawn! SUPERKICK PARTAAAAYYYY!

Michaels continues the offensive until Tanaka tags out to Sato, who quickly eats a neckbreaker from the future Mr. WrestleMania. However, Tanaka kicks Shawn from the apron, allowing Sato to nail him with a gutbuster. Tanaka comes in and hits him with a NICE cross-chop, then Sato comes in with a flying knee for two. Sato slows things down with a DOUBLE nervehold, then Tanaka comes in and does his own flip out of a back body drop…but Michaels catches him with a clothesline!

HOT TAG MARTY, who cleans house on both guys as even Gorilla points out the Rockers’ earlier lethargy. The Rockers (kinda) double-dropkick Sato out, and Tanaka takes a crazy twisting bump off a double back body drop.

The Rockers head up, but Fuji distracts Marty, allowing Sato to hurl salt into his eyes! Marty stumbles around, falling over the guardrail and into the fans. This results in an Orient Express win via count-out.

**1/2 - Not bad, but nothing that’ll set your heart ablaze, either. Marty and Shawn were still pretty good here, even if they were at half-speed and without some of their usual coordination. The MVP was Tanaka, who took some nice bumps and hit some really cool offense. Not sure why we needed a shitty count-out finish, though.

The Rockers and the Orient Express would have MUCH better matches once Sato was permanently replaced with Paul Diamond under the “Kato” moniker.

Backstage, Steve Allen checks in on Rhythm & Blues.

Honky Tonk Man apparently reminds him of Elvis…

…Elvis Costello, that is! Oh, you clever dog.

Greg Valentine says that they’re rockin’ their way to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Allen: “I’ll call ahead and warn them you’re coming”.

“Hacksaw” Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo

As usual, Bravo’s got Jimmy Hart and Earthquake in tow.

Hacksaw’s got Old Glory with him. He tries to start a “USA” chant, but the crowd is like “haha, fuck you, buddy”. They’re with him for the “HOOOOOOOOOO”s, though.

We start with a show of power from both guys, with Hacksaw soon dispatching Bravo with a clothesline to the floor. After Bravo returns, Duggan dodges some slow-motion punches and gets some fists of his own in the corner.

Duggan misses a blind charge, allowing Dino to take over with a clothesline and some punches. Brave chokes Duggan for a bit, then distracts the ref to allow Quake some blows. Bravo continues his attack, but Duggan starts to fire up! Punches abound until Bravo counters a back body drop with a kick, then it’s more stomping. Duggan catches a charge with a knee and assaults Bravo with some clotheslines.

Earthquake stops Duggan from doing the three-point clothesline, then Jimmy Hart tosses the 2x4 into the ring. However, Duggan intercepts, clubs Bravo with the board, and gets the three.

Quake, ever the polite Canadian boy, waits for the ref to count the three before attacking Hacksaw. Earthquake drops a couple of huge elbows and a trio of butt splashes before leaving.

1/4* - Thankfully short, but still awful. To be fair, it’s 1990 Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo. If you were expecting anything good, I can’t help but salute your optimism.

We get some highlights of the Jake Roberts/Ted DiBiase beef that’s been going on since May 1989, with Roberts stealing the Million Dollar Belt and stuffing it into his snake bag. The feud even resulted in the breakup of the Twin Towers and Big Boss Man’s face turn.

Million Dollar Belt: “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase vs. Jake “The Snake” Roberts

Thankfully, DiBiase’s theme is still intact here. MONEY, MONEY, MONEY, MONEY, MONEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY!

Backstage, Jake cuts one of the best promos of his career and a top promo of the year so far. Jake recounts DiBiase exploiting those with less money than him, so Roberts will make HIM beg. He’ll be the one who grovels for HIS money.

"How appropriate...that the money you beg for will be your very own. A victim of your own greed. Wallowing in the muck of avarice."

That, my friends, is a goddamn BAR. It’s not just the words, though. It’s the tone, the volume, the pace, everything is masterful. Not a syllable wasted.

We get a fast and furious start, with aggressive lock-ups and right hands, with Jake getting a kneelift and a quick DDT tease that forces DiBiase to retreat and re-strategize. They exchange missed elbowdrops, then DiBiase escapes a couple more DDT attempts. DiBiase bails, but Jake yanks him back in by the arm and goes to work on the limb with repeated kneedrops and a hammerlock, with Roberts chirping at him the whole time.

Roberts maintains the hold until DiBiase reverses…but Jake uses DiBiase’s momentum to send him to the floor. Back in, DiBiase elbows Jake to counter a back body drop, but he runs into a knee. Jake goes for a big kneelift, but DiBiase dodges and allows Roberts to take a huge turnbuckle bump.

DiBiase takes over with some stomps as the fans famously do THE WAVE, during which Ted smartly front-facelocks Jake.

On the floor, DiBiase rams Jake’s arm into the ringpost as the wave makes another round. Back in, DiBiase hits a piledriver and takes his time going for the pin. Jake reverses into a near-fall of his own before DiBiase drops some knees to regain the upper hand. Ted slaps on the Million Dollar Dream, but Jake eventually escapes via the ropes.

Moments later, DiBiase tries a flying axehandle, but Jake intercepts with a punch to the gut as the fans are HUNGRY for the DDT. Roberts continues his onslaught, capping it with a short clothesline, the precursor to the DDT. Jakes looks to follow up, but Virgil pulls Jake out and eats a slam on the floor for his troubles. DiBiase slaps on the Million Dollar Dream again while they’re both on the outside, and after some brawling, Virgil tosses DiBiase back into the ring. Jake gets counted out, so the Million Dollar Man is the rightful possessor of the Million Dollar Belt.

*** - Yet another shitty count-out finish, but the match beforehand was the best so far. It was well-worked with aggression, focus, character work, effective DDT teases, and a decent story.

Post-match, Roberts attacks DiBiase and Virgil, then Jake FINALLY gets the DDT and gives away some very real $100 bills to fans at ringside. Even Mary Tyler Moore sitting in the crowd gets a c-note, much to Jesse’s hilarious annoyance.

DiBiase then gets a bill stuck in his mouth, which is probably the most comeuppance the character got at that point. Damien makes an appearance, but Virgil pulls Teddy out before he can be snaked. Jake chases the bodyguard to the back.

Sean Mooney chats with Akeem and Slick in the locker room. The Doctor of Style explains that DiBiase has given him and Akeem several thousand reasons why they’ll take out The Big Boss Man.

Mean Gene interviews the Boss Man, who says DiBiase is SCUM! He doesn’t take money from anyone! He’s poor, but he’s PROUD!

The Big Boss Man vs. Akeem

Neither “Servin’ Hard Times” nor “Jive Soul Bro” made it past legal?!?

Boss Man gets his Attitude Era music instead, which is just WRONG. At least we can still hear the huge pop he gets.

As Big Boss Man makes his way to the ring, Ted DiBiase, who was still at ringside, attacks him from behind! That allows the African Dream the early advantage with some clubbing blows. Avalanche gets a quick two as Boss Man impressively powers out of the pin.

After some more blows from Akeem, Boss Man gets a bad atomic drop out of the corner, then he whips him repeatedly into the turnbuckles. Boss Man Slam finishes Akeem in a tad under two minutes.

After the match, Boss Man takes out Slick. I do like that the events of the last match transitioned directly to this one as those two feuds were intertwined.

While the match was sloppy and short, it does set up the Boss Man vs. DiBiase feud for the house show circuit. Other than a Saturday Night’s Main Event rematch with The Boss Man of Big and sporadic TV appearances, that was it for Akeem being anything of consequence.

Sean Mooney asks several crowd members about the upcoming Rhythm & Blues performance, including Mary Tyler Moore. She humors Sean, but it's readily apparent she couldn’t possibly give anything resembling a shit about Rhythm & Blues.

Hunka Hunka Hunka Honky DUD

Time for some truly useless filler as we get Rhythm & Blues (Honky Tonk Man & Greg “The Hammer” Valentine with his hair dyed jet black) performing “Hunka Hunka Hunka Honky Love”. They enter the arena to HTM’s classic “Cool, Cocky, Bad”, the infinitely superior song.

They are famously driven to the ring by Diamond Dallas Page, a then-relative unknown who owned the pink Cadillac. Apparently, Tugboat let management know that DDP had the car and was willing to let them use it, so he got the spot. It’s kinda neat that DDP would actually have his first WrestleMania match in SkyDome 12 years later.

The song itself, though, does not make the hands clap, though that’s probably the point. Still kinda catchy, though. After the performance, The Bushwhackers, dressed as merchandise vendors, come out and wreck shop.

Hey, it’s the same goddamn WrestleMania VII ad we saw twice already!

Let’s FLIP OVER THE DISC TO CONTINUE!

You kids and your streaming platforms don’t know the PAIN of getting off your ass to change tapes and discs.

Howard Finkel announces 67,678 fans in attendance.

“Ravishing” Rick Rude vs. “Superfly” Jimmy Snuka

Rude debuts the slicked back hair here, which is a step in the right direction, looks-wise. It foreshadows a significant change of character, as he’d go from goofy lothario into a serious upper-card threat. Later in the year, he’d cut his hair short, which I feel is the peak Rude look. He’d have his best in-ring years with the shorter hair, so he was like a reverse Samson.

Steve Allen joins the boys at the commentation station. We get one last music edit, with Superfly’s theme getting obscured by some crazy 80’s synth pop, like something that would play over a training montage.

Rude attacks Snuka from behind and rains down some elbows, but a dropkick misses. Snuka hits Rude with a flapjack and does his own hip swivels. Snuka lands a headbutt and a dropkick to send Rude to the floor, then counters a sunset flip with a fist. Rude hits a snap suplex to regain control, then beats away at Superfly…until Snuka rams Rude’s face into the canvas.

Rude shoulderblocks Snuka down, but Jimmy fires back with a jumping headbutt. Rude intercepts a top rope move, then we get some awkward offense from Snuka. Superfly heads up, but a diving headbutt misses. A particularly vicious Rude Awakening gets the three.

3/4* - This wasn’t more than an awkward, quickie squash for Rude, who was being primed for a move up the card. Snuka, as was the case around this time, was little more than a warm body with name value to be fed to the guy they wanted to push.

We get a video recap of the events leading to the title vs. title match.

WWF Championship and Intercontinental Championship: Hulk Hogan (c) vs. The Ultimate Warrior (c)

Here we are, kids. After an iconic interaction at the Royal Rumble and weeks of brain-meltingly ridiculous promos, we’ve arrived at the main event.

The Warrior infamously runs down the LONG aisleway to the ring, which, combined with his terrible cardio and possible nerves, resulted in him sucking wind before the bell even rang.

We get a shoving match to start, then each man wins a tie-up showdown, with the crowd going especially bonkers for Hulk. Time for an EPIC knucklelock, with the WARYAH bringing HO KOGAN to his knees.

Hogan comes back to life, and Warrior’s on HIS knees now! Hogan trips Warrior and hits an elbow for two, then we get a couple of criss-cross sequences that end with Warrior damaging Hogan with a bodyslam after Warrior no-sold one from Hulk. Warrior clotheslines Hogan out of the ring, and Hulk’s knee is buggered.

This slows down the match a bit until Warrior tosses Hogan back in. Warrior kicks at the leg, then they start raking each others’ eyes and choking each other. Hogan fights back with punches as his knee seems to be OK. That fibber!

Gorilla suggests that Hogan’s patella was temporarily dislocated, and it slipped back in. As someone who has had each patella come loose multiple times, it would still hurt like a bitch, and you’d still be limping. Methinks the knee stuff was a tactic so that Warrior can get some oxygen back. According to Dave Meltzer, the knee injury sequence was some sort of inside joke, but I’m not sure what it would be.

Hogan gets a small package for two, then he continues with punches and chops. A big clothesline gets two, as does a backbreaker. Hogan hits the chinlock as it’s clear that Warrior’s still struggling to get his breath. A back suplex gets two, then it’s back to the chinlock. Warrior finally fights out with the encouragement of the fans, but both guys clothesline each other down!

Warrior sits up and starts WARRIORING UP! Hogan clobbers him, but to no avail! Warrior gets off some punches and some clotheslines, then hits a vertical suplex for two. Bearhug time!

This goes on for a good few minutes until Hogan fights out of it to rapturous applause. Warrior goes to tackle Hogan, but referee Earl Hebner gets bumped! Warrior gets a couple of top-rope axehandles, but Hogan dodges a shoulderblock by shoving him face-down into the mat. Hulk gets a visual pinfall, so he goes to wake up the ref, allowing Warrior to hit a back suplex for his OWN visual pinfall.

Hebner counts, but Hogan kicks out! Hulk gets a schoolboy roll-up for a near-fall, then Hogan elbows Warrior out of the ring for some brawling…and BOTH GUYS GET COUNTED OUT?!?!?

Nah, just kidding.

Warrior rams Hogan into the post, then we head back in for another Warrior clothesline and a press slam!

Warrior gets the splash, but Hogan kicks out and he’s HULKING UP! WARYAH’S punches do not faze the Hulkster! Hogan gets his own punches, and it’s the big boot! Legdrop misses! Warrior hits the splash and barely keeps Hogan down for the three and the WWF Championship!

After the match, a dejected Hogan snatches the belt and hands it to Warrior before finally leaving via the ring cart. We alternate between shots of Warrior celebrating and Hogan looking sad on the ring cart to end the show.

***3/4 - This was about as well-worked as you were going to get with these two. The match was kept super-basic, which was needed due to the limitations these guys (Warrior especially) had as workers. It could have been a disaster due to Warrior’s cardio, but, for everything that’s been said about Hogan, he did a fine job carrying a winded Warrior on his back through a long main event. When Warrior finally got it together, he held up his end of the deal.

The last few minutes were truly exciting, and the opening was about as epic and grandiose as you would want. It was basically two live-action superheroes going at it before it became standard summer blockbuster fare.

On the negative side, there were some parts of the middle that dragged with overly long holds. Trim a few minutes, and you'd have a much tighter overall package. What we got, though, was a very strong main-event.

The readers of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter actually voted this the #4 match of the year. I imagine a lot of readers were surprised at how non-terrible a Hogan/Warrior match would be, or they were enamored with the sheer spectacle and atmosphere. Hell, maybe both. I don’t see it making my personal top ten, but it’s a damn fine match.

As a result of winning the WWF Championship, Warrior relinquished the Intercontinental title so he can focus on defending the big prize. We’ll find out the fate of the IC title later on in the timeline. We’ll also find out how Warrior’s title reign goes.

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FINAL THOUGHTS

Overall, this is very much a one-match show, but that match delivered what it needed to and even overdelivered in some respects. If you judge the rest of the show purely on match quality, it’s pretty bad with only two matches crossing the ten minute mark and THREE count-out finishes. That kind of stuff was normal for PPVs 30-40 years ago, but if any promotion charged $72.33 for this show today, fans would be storming the company's headquarters like it was January 6th.

Despite this, I still really enjoy WrestleMania VI. The matches, while mostly brief, are still worthwhile and fun, though not without a few clunkers. There are also some satisfying payoffs and memorable moments to keep things interesting.

Your mileage will vary depending on the kind of wrestling you enjoy and when you started watching, but I’d still recommend giving this show a look just for the history, the characters, and the overall vibe. If you’re a longtime fan, or a lapsed fan, it’s still a blast to revisit.

On the most important note, I’m FINALLY done talking about Hogan/Warrior promos!

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NEXT TIME: Some of the other stuff that happened on 4/1 and beyond, including another top ten Wrestling Observer Match of the Year. Also, I look at an obscure Japanese indie and other stuff!

Catch up on the rest of Ryan Navigates ‘90

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Ryan's Dive into '95

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