Ryan Navigates '90 - #32 (The Family Feud Wrestlers Special!)
SURVEY SAYS...
Family Feud - NWA vs. GLOW (5/7 - 5/11)
Good day!
For a special Part 32 of Ryan Navigates ‘90, we’re going to sail the majestic seas of Mark Goodson Productions as we take a look at an all-wrestling week of that classic game show staple, Family Feud.
Long before the days where the show became an excuse for writers to ask questions like “what reindeer would Santa Claus name his junk after?” in order to elicit over-the-top reactions from Steve Harvey, this iteration of the Feud was hosted by Ray Combs. Ray was a stand-up comedian who hosted the show from its revival in 1988 until 1994, where he was replaced by original host Richard Dawson due to dismal ratings.
After his tenure with Family Feud ended, Combs struggled with financial and familial issues, and spinal damage from a 1994 automobile accident left Ray in considerable long-term pain. Unfortunately, his story does not have a happy ending, as Combs took his own life in July 1996.
As a game show-obsessed youngster in the early ‘90s, Family Feud was a cornerstone of my nightly TV diet, so I have some nostalgic fondness for Mr. Combs. During his run as Feud host, Ray emceed several wrestling-centric Family Feud specials. They would often feature the NWA/WCW, GLOW, the WWF, and even the ill-fated World Bodybuilding Federation. He’d even appear on a couple of WWF PPVs, doing guest ring announcer duty for WrestleMania VIII and Survivor Series 1993.
This particular week of the feud will see wrestlers representing the National Wrestling Alliance taking on the stars of GLOW, the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling.
In an interesting sign of things to come, the NWA team’s big sliding oval thing says “WCW” on it, and there’s a “World Championship Wrestling” banner on the wall behind them. The WCW branding is becoming more and more prominent as Turner moves closer to severing ties with the National Wrestling Alliance entirely.
Representing the NWA are Sting, Lex Luger, Scott Steiner, Rick Steiner, and Road Warrior Animal!
Representing GLOW are Jackie Stallone, Godiva, Daisy, Babe the Farmer's Daughter, and Hollywood!
Everyone who’s been reading the series should be familiar with the NWA and their players, so I’ll go into a little bit about GLOW and their participants.
The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling was an all-female wrestling promotion that was started in the mid-1980s by David McLane. The pilot for the TV show was shot in December 1985, and the series started proper in 1986.
Unlike other wrestling promotions that mainly used television as a vehicle to promote year-round live house shows, GLOW was strictly a TV product, and there was an honest-to-God off-season when the show wasn’t being filmed. The actual in-ring action was secondary to the over-the-top characters, storylines, and comedy skits. That honestly doesn’t make it sound that much different than a lot of American wrestling promotions, but GLOW was produced like a TV show that happened to have wrestling matches on it.
Not only did the TV mentality manifest in the production, but in the casting as well. The roster was mostly comprised of actresses, stuntwomen, dancers, models, and other prospective entertainers looking to break into Hollywood. There were hundreds of auditions, and the few who made the final cut were trained for the in-ring component at first by Mando Guerrero (Eddy’s brother and Gory’s son), then by veteran women’s wrestler Princess Jasmine. Jasmine would later wrestle as Pepper on GLOW television.
Because the gimmicks were treated as roles on a television show, the characters were cast and re-cast with different women over the years. In fact, before the third season, McLane and several members of the original cast, not happy with the excessive camp and goofiness of the promotion, did a NOAH-like exodus of the company and formed Powerful Women of Wrestling, or POWW. That promotion focused more on the wrestling aspect, while GLOW forged ahead for seasons 3 and 4 with new women to play their characters.
The original run of syndicated television episodes lasted four seasons, from 1986 to 1990. Twenty-six episodes were produced for each season, resulting in a total of 104 episodes for the entire run.
In 2001, Ursula Hayden, who portrayed the characters of Babe the Farmer’s Daughter, Donna Matrix, and Princess of Darkness, bought the rights to the brand and resurrected it with some live shows. The events featured both returning talent and a few new women, such as Sara Deathray (Sara Del Rey/Sara Amato, who we got to see briefly in Wrestling Society X) and VH1 (Ring of Honor and independent wrestler Taeler Hendrix). She also helped restore the original episodes of the TV show for streaming on the company’s website.
Hayden also consulted for the acclaimed “GLOW” Netflix comedy-drama series that was inspired by the original promotion. Unfortunately, Hayden passed away in December 2022 at age 56 after a long battle with cancer.
We just learned a bit about Babe the Farmer’s Daughter, but let’s briefly look at the other players.
Yes, Jackie Stallone is the mother of Sylvester and, you guessed it, Frank Stallone. What’s with all these Stallones in my wrestling review series?!? She played the kayfabe role of GLOW’s owner and was also the “house mother” of the babyface wrestlers, collectively known as Stallone’s Sweethearts. Jackie also rapped! She made it to 98 years of age before passing away in September 2020.
Godiva, played by Dawn Maestas, was inspired by Lady Godiva, who, in Anglo-Saxon legend, rode into town completely starkers on a horse in order to stop her husband’s excessive taxation on the populace of Coventry. GLOW’s Godiva rode to the ring on horseback but would wear a flesh-colored bodysuit and artfully-placed flowers.
I wasn’t able to find much out about Daisy (played by Helena LaCount), other than she was apparently a slave to the villainous Gremlina at one point, then broke free and joined Stallone’s Sweethearts. She’s also rather tall, standing 6’2” in height.
Hollywood, portrayed by Jeanne Marie Basone, was the first actress hired on for the pilot, and had actually stayed with GLOW for all four seasons of the TV show. Post-GLOW, Basone stuck around in wrestling for a bit, working for various smaller all-female companies. She also has quite a bit of acting and stunt work under her belt. However, video game nerds may remember her turn as Jane in the 3DO (and Windows) interactive romantic comedy, “Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties”, an all-time legendary piece of kusoge (“shitty game”).
Fun fact: Limited Run Games put out a re-release of this game on modern consoles in March 2024.
Now, I only have access to the Fast Money rounds, where the day’s winning team sends two representatives to answer five rapid-fire questions with the goal of getting a combined 200 points. I’ll look at how each day’s round went.
Alright, let’s play THE FEUD!
MONDAY, MAY 7th
Team NWA/WCW won the day, so they offer up Scott and Rick Steiner. Big Poppa Pump opens things up, and he gets 15 seconds instead of the now-standard 20 seconds.
“Name one of the costs of owning a car”
Scott hits big with “insurance” for 57 points.
“Something you drink through straws”
He answers with “pop”, which is very Canadian of him. That scores 38 points.
“How long a long shower lasts”
“15 minutes” for 28 points.
“A meat you get from a pig”
The Big Bad Booty Daddy answers with “pork chops” for 48 points.
“Something that moves easily over snow”
Scott answers “snowmobile” for 21 big ones.
Freakzilla crushed that round, racking up a whopping 192 points by himself. Rick would need to supremely shit the bed to not get those last 8 points, but I’ve seen it happen.
At the very least, Rick with his Bill the Cat shirt and Zubaz shorts has “Best Dressed” for 1990 sewn up.
The Dog-Faced Gremlin gets 20 seconds (as opposed to the 25 seconds contestants get now for the second portion of Fast Money) and the same five questions.
“Name one of the costs of owning a car”
Rick answers with “$9000”, earning laughs from the audience and zero points.
“Something you drink through straws”
Rick makes a go with the more American-sounding “soda”, which is a repeat, so he answers with “milkshake”.
“How long a long shower lasts”
“5 minutes”, per Rick. I hope I never have to sit next to HIM on a plane.
“A meat you get from a pig”
He tries “pork” and “pork chops” before settling on “bacon”.
“Something that moves easily over snow”
Rick duplicates “snowmobile”, and the timer runs out before “skis” can be accepted.
Rick looks slightly dejected at his effort, but he should be fine.
Ray has a laugh about the “$9000” answer, but “milkshake” nets 51 points and $5,000 that was immediately blown on Zubaz, ROOS, and narcotics for Team WCW’s charity, whatever it is!
TUESDAY, MAY 8th
GLOW took home the dub today, so Hollywood is first up for Fast Money.
“Name a gift of clothing you can buy for someone even if you don’t know the exact size”
Hollywood answers with, “a baby”! You can’t buy and wear a baby, you silly goose!
“Illegal in all 50 states”, quips Ray. That answer gets nothing and likes it.
“An animal that lives in the mountains”
She goes with “a deer” for 10 points.
🎶 “I like pizza
I like bagels
I like hotdogs with mustard and beer.
I'll eat eggplant
I could even eat a…” 🎶
🎶 “…lalalalalalalala,
who's that baby deer on the laaaaaaawwwwwn” 🎶
“A job that is almost always held by a man”
“Construction worker” replies Hollywood for 21 points.
“The kind of beverage you drink most”
Hollywood answers “soda” for 40!
“How many pounds is a large baby?”
Hollywood replies with “30 pounds”! Good lord.
She gets no points, but earns some gentle ribbing from Ray on that one. Hollywood eked out a rather okay 71 points for that effort, and it’s Godiva’s turn!
“Name a gift of clothing you can buy for someone even if you don’t know the exact size”
Godiva says “shoes”, which gets zip. “Scarf” was the number one answer, and she fires back with “that’s not clothes, that’s an accessory!”. I definitely wouldn’t have guessed that one.
“An animal that lives in the mountains”
“Wolf” for another zero. Yikes. “Mountain lion” was number one.
“A job that is almost always held by a man”
Godiva goes with “fireman” for three big ones! Number one was “construction worker”, which Hollywood supplied earlier.
“The kind of beverage you drink most”
She repeats “soda”, then settles on “iced tea”, which nets 10 points. “Soda” was number one.
“How many pounds is a large baby?”
A much less monstrous “8 (pounds)” is answered, but that only nets 7 points. “Ten pounds” was number one.
Hollywood and Godiva’s efforts combine for 91 points. Given $5 per point, they earn $455 for their charity.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 9th
WCW won today’s game, putting them up 2-1 in the series. Sting kicks off the Fast Money round. Ray’s rocking a tuxedo without the jacket, which makes him look like a referee.
“Name a kind of repairman you might have to stay home from work to let him in”
Sting goes with “air conditioning” for zero points, causing him to briefly (and ironically) lose his cool.
“A job on a cruise ship”
“Bartender”, which earns a “we’re really getting to know you” jab from Ray. Yeeaaahhhhhh…
That scores 9. Points on the board, baby!
“One word to describe the streets of New York”
Sting goes with “dirty” for 25 points.
“The best awards show on TV”
The Stinger replies with “the Academy Awards” for 41 points.
“The age when people have their first romance”
Sting says “16” for 56 points.
It looked a bit dicey at first, but Stinger made a strong comeback to score 131 points. Rick Steiner assumes the role of anchor today and needs at least 69. Nice.
Rick traded in his Bill the Cat shirt for the standard-issue Gold’s Gym garb.
“Name a kind of repairman you might have to stay home from work to let him in”
Rick gives us “refrigerator”, which gets a surprising goose-egg. “Plumber” was number one. You know who would have gotten that one? Dusty Rhodes.
“A job on a cruise ship”
The Dog-Faced Gremlin answers with “waiter” for 4 points. “Captain” was number one. You know who would have gotten that one? Captain Mike Rotunda.
“One word to describe the streets of New York”
Steiner replies with “crime” to add 2 to the team’s point pool. “Dirty” was the number one answer. You know who would have gotten that one? Sting.
“The best awards show on TV”
After some struggle, he goes with “music awards”. He’s later asked to clarify which ones and just settles on “music awards” for 9. Maybe the judges assumed he meant the Grammys, I guess? Sting had the number one answer with “Academy Awards”. No love for the Dundies?
“The age when people have their first romance”
Rick answers with “18” for 3. Again, Sting had the top answer with “16”.
An even more anemic round this time for Rick, amassing a whopping 18 points on his end and squandering the big gains made by Sting. They should have had Scott up there instead.
Sting and Rick accumulate 149 points total, resulting in $745 for charity.
THURSDAY, MAY 10th
WCW wins again, putting them up 3-1. Sting again kicks off Fast Money.
“Name something that’s hard to do when your hair is too long”
Sting gives “comb it” for 9 points.
“A word that rhymes with ‘rush’”
He answers with “hush”. He grimaced after that one, but it got 26 points, which turned out to be the number one answer. You gotta have more confidence in yourself, man. Believe in Steve!
“A part of your body you stretch”
The Man Called Sting answers with “hamstrings” for 38 big boys.
“How much sugar do you put in a cup of coffee?”
“Two cubes”, sayeth Sting, earning nothing. That’s pretty harsh.
“A color of bear”
After a second of contemplation, he goes with “brown”. That’s the number one answer, worth 54 points.
Sting has another decent outing, amassing 127 for his team. Now it’s Road Warrior Animal’s turn.
“Name something that’s hard to do when your hair is too long”
Animal says, “uhhh, go for a walk”…
…
*record scratch*
…
…I’m sorry…
…
…what?!
This may surprise you, but it gets zero. “Wash it” was number one.
“A word that rhymes with ‘rush’”
After a moment where you can almost literally hear the gears in his skull grind to a halt, Animal utters “cush”. The other guys shouting “IT’S UP THERE!” is pretty hilarious.
Naturally, that gets zip, which prompts Sting yells “IT’S FIXED”! He got the top answer earlier.
“A part of your body you stretch”
A sensible answer this time, with “back” for 16. “Legs”, including the previously-answered hammies, was number one.
“How much sugar do you put in a cup of coffee?”
“Two spoons”, for 22 points. They really should have given that one to Sting since two cubes is about equal to two teaspoons. Who do they have judging this, the Four Horsemen?
“One teaspoon” was the top answer.
“A color of bear”
He repeats “brown”, but quickly pivots to “black” for 31 points.
They end with a total of 196 points, JUST missing out on the five grand. If only Hawk said something slightly less imbecilic for either of those first two questions. Ah, well, the charity still gets $980.
I can only imagine how much more insane the answers would be if it were Hawk instead of Animal.
FRIDAY, MAY 11th
Again, the NWA takes the game and moves on to Fast Money. WCW dominated the week with four wins to GLOW’s one. Kind of a shame that we didn’t get to see GLOW win at least one more game, but such is life.
I finally learn that the NWA’s charity is the Starlight Foundation, which does some pretty nice things for children to make their hospital stays less terrible. That’s good, at least.
Lex Luger kicks us off, so we get to see all five NWA guys take a stab at Fast Money. We’ll see if that fancy college edumacation pays off for the Total Package.
“Name a food that leaves crumbs”
Lex goes with “cake” for 19 points.
“Something you grind”
Luger passes, then comes up empty when they return to the question at the end.
“Any kind of cheese”
Lex answers with “cheddar”, which nets 32!
“Something a baby uses”
After some internal conflict, he blurts out “…toys”. That gets zero.
“The age when men start coloring their hair”
“40” for 51, putting them just halfway over the target at 102 points. That was the number one answer.
Oof. Lex choked like he was wrestling Yokozuna out there, but did make up some ground with that last answer. Sting, who’s had some strong showings, is in the hammer position.
“Name a food that leaves crumbs”
Sting answers “crackers” for 27. “Bread/toast” was number one.
“Something you grind”
Unlike Lex, Sting has an answer. “Coffee” gets 32, the number one answer!
“Any kind of cheese”
After repeating “cheddar”, he goes with “Swiss”. That gets 24. Lex gave the number one answer.
“Something a baby uses”
“Uh, a teething ring”, which is too specific and gets zero. “Diapers” was the top answer.
“The age when men start coloring their hair”
“41”, which gets zero because answers that don’t end with a “5” or “0” for those kinds of questions tend to be death.
A bit of a shame to see Sting trip before the goal line, but he had a good week overall. They end the round with 183 points, good for another $915 for the Starlight Foundation. I’m surprised that Scott Steiner only played one round despite absolutely destroying out there the first night, but that’s 1990 NWA booking for you.
If YOU want to try out for Family Feud, give those numbers a jingle! Long distance charges may apply!
OK, I had a LOT of fun doing that, and I hope you had fun reading it. I hope I get to do more of this kind of thing in future articles.
NEXT TIME: Back to normal wrestling stuff, people! We have another Saturday special, with Chris Adams vs. Steve Austin, more developments in the Jerry Lawler vs. Jimmy Valiant feud, and more!
Catch up on the rest of Ryan Navigates ‘90
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