Ryan's Dive into '95 - Part 38 (9/17 - 9/23)

The one with the "Cane Dewey" promo. Plus, GARY SPIVEY, WCW Fall Brawl, GAEA, lucha, Monday Night Wars, and more!

If you haven’t read it already, please check out my introductory article that explains what this series is all about. As a reminder, footage is sourced from the Goodhelmet 1995 Yearbook, unless otherwise stated.

How ya now?

We have a packed week at The Dive. Aside from the Monday Night Wars coverage, we have plenty from WCW Fall Brawl, a bloody brawl from GAEA, a legendary promo from Mick Foley, Gary Spivey, hair vs. hair action from CMLL, a Wrestling Observer top ten match of the year from AAA, and more!

Well…

SEPTEMBER 17th

GAEA First Fight in Osaka

Street Fight: Mayumi Ozaki vs. Chigusa Nagayo - The on-screen graphic says “The Street Fight in Full House”. Did Joey tell Uncle Jesse to “Cut It Out” one too many times? Did Danny push the rest of the Tanner household too far with his obsessive cleanliness? Did Michelle turn violent during her amnesia episode after she fell off the horse?

This isn’t labeled as a “Dress Up Wild Fight” likely due to the difference in promotion, but both ladies are in their street clothes. Rather than fighting Dynamite Kansai, Ozaki is battling in enemy territory against GAEA’s founder and ace.

We start with Nagayo choking Ozaki with a bullrope. Ozaki is ALREADY busted open, and it's a gusher.

Ozaki fights back with punches and use of the rope, but Nagayo stops that comeback and hits some suplexes for near-falls. After some choking, Nagayo clobbers Ozaki some more, but Ozaki shows FIGHTING SPIRIT and GRABS THE CHAIN! Ozaki beats and chokes her with that for a bit.

Ozaki drags Nagayo to the floor and whips her into the railing, then we head into the crowd for more punishment. Ozaki rains down a couple of chairshots and brings Nagayo back to the ring. Nagayo breaks free and now it's her turn to pound Ozaki with the chain. Nagayo goes back to the rope and hits a powerbomb for two.

Ozaki escapes a running crucifix bomb, but not a kick to the head. Seconds later, Ozaki tries a top rope Frankensteiner, but they both kind of collapse to the floor. We head into the rear of the stands where Ozaki smacks Nagayo with a table, then starts going nuts with chairs. We head back to the ring where Ozaki (kind of) hits a sunset flip powerbomb on the floor. Ozaki follows with a twisting senton, then brings a table into the ring. Nagayo practically lassos her with the rope and lands a high kick.

Nagayo nails a backdrop onto the flat table, then sets it up. Piledriver on the table is blocked, and Ozaki hits a DDT onto it! Seconds later, Nagoya goes for a running powerslam through the table, but Ozaki escapes and hits a half-and-half suplex for two! Senton onto Nagayo's back gets two, but Nagayo blocks a rolling cradle with a powerbomb! Ozaki counters a running powerbomb with a sunset flip for two! Nagayo hits a powerbomb onto the table. It doesn't break!

Ozaki bridges out of the pin and catches Nagayo with a sleeper as the GAEA fans shriek in terror. Nagayo escapes, but Ozaki comes right back with four half-and-half suplexes! That gets two! Ozaki batters Nagayo with kicks, this time looking for a knockout. Nagayo beats the count and lariats Ozaki down! Nagayo follows with a couple of suplexes and head kicks, but Ozaki beats the count. Nagayo punches her repeatedly, but Ozaki again beats the count.

Ozaki comes back with a backfist to the back of the head, but Nagayo quickly hits a gutwrench powerbomb off of the table! Ozaki can't beat the count! Nagayo wins by K.O.

***1/4 - This was a good, bloody brawl, but it doesn't touch the two matches we saw Ozaki have with Dynamite Kansai. Those ones, especially the first, were inspired insanity. This one felt like a traditional match with some violence thrown in. That’s not necessarily bad, though; it's a different approach that can still work, but it didn’t completely gel for me here.

There were definitely some ‘off’ moments here. It felt like Nagayo wasn’t co-operative and didn’t want to bump for some of Ozaki’s moves, which just made things look really sloppy at times. The finish was also a bit anticlimactic. It's still violent fun, though, and I really dug Ozaki's overall effort here.

WCW Fall Brawl: WAR GAMES

Coming to you HOT from the Asheville Civic Center in Asheville, NC, we have a lot to look at from this show, including two full matches!

Stuff that happened on the Main Event pre-show:

• Big Bubba Rogers defeated Mark Thorn via pinfall with the Bubba/Bossman Slam.

• Disco Inferno pinned Joey Maggs after a neckbreaker.

• Alex Wright vs. Eddy Guerrero ended in a no-contest.

  • This was Eddy’s first on-screen appearance in WCW.

  • The finish came when Eddy injured his knee on the outside of the ring. Rather than take the countout win, Wright asked for a no-decision because SPORTSMANSHIP. Not exactly an optimal way to debut a new talent.

• The American Males (Marcus Bagwell and Scotty Riggs) defeated The Nasty Boys after interference from “Dirty” Dick Slater.

  • The Nasties were apparently threatening to quit if they had to job to the Males. They didn’t end up quitting, but they apparently continued to complain about the loss backstage after the match.

Flyin’ Brian vs. Johnny B. Badd - This is a #1 Contender’s match for the US title currently held by Sting, and it’s face vs. face. The fans are more into Badd, surprisingly enough.

If you're going to ask for someone to join you in holy matrimony, at least spell their name correctly. Regardless, Johnny B. Badd, meet Down Badd.

We get the super-special Michael Buffer intros here. The Code of Honor is upheld, and we get some fun sportsmanlike grappling to start. The sequence ends with both guys attempting simultaneous dropkicks to show PARITY. Both guys continue trading the upper hand during the opening stages, with Badd scoring a La Majistral and Pillman getting a near fall with a European clutch-style flash pin.

Pillman assumes control with a flying headscissors and snags a front roll-up for two. Badd takes over after a slick armdrag and works a headlock, even holding on during a hiptoss attempt. Pillman escapes with a backbreaker and starts to work over the back. Boston crab, but Pillman releases and lands the first punch of the match!

Pillman starts to work heel, chopping and taunting Badd, but Johnny comes back with a quebradora for two. Badd works over the leg, then transitions to a surfboard.

Pillman makes the ropes, and it's time for Badd to deck Pillman! Pillman reassumes the lead for a bit with some heel tactics, but Badd comes back with some boxing until Pillman powders. Pillman comes back in and offers the handshake, but Badd is much more reluctant to accept. Moments later, Badd gets a slingshot legdrop for a close near-fall. We get a leapfrog sequence that ends with both guys colliding in mid-air. Badd FIRES UP…but Pillman snuffs that out with a headbutt that knocks Badd loopy and causes him to roll outside. Pillman tries to suplex Badd back in, but Badd suplexes Pillman to the floor in a crazy bump!

We have five minutes remaining as Badd follows with a pescado and goes for a top rope axehandle…but Pillman dropkicks him in mid-air! That earns a two-count, then Badd hits a sitdown powerbomb for two! Tombstone from Pillman gets two! Badd tosses Brian off a tornado DDT attempt and goes for a seated abdominal stretch, but releases when Buffer announces the two minutes warning! Pillman gets a Russian legsweep into a grounded octopus!

Pillman moves to a grounded cobra stretch as we're under a minute left! Badd mounts a comeback with a facebuster and the Tutti Fruitti (a left-handed punch)! Pillman’s in the ropes! AIR PILLMAN! BADD KICKS OUT! The time limit expires! We have a draw!

…or so we thought. Referee Nick Patrick authorizes SUDDEN DEATH OVERTIME! That…doesn’t really make sense if you think about it. I like that we’re getting more of this match, but calling it SUDDEN DEATH is odd. It’s not like it was an ironman or marathon match.

Regardless, the match continues! They slug it out inside the ring and at ringside where Pillman gains the advantage. Missile dropkick from Pillman, but Badd fends that off with his own dropkick. Brian locks in a sleeper with a bodyscissors.

Badd escapes via the ropes and gets his OWN sleeper, but Pillman counters with a back suplex! Badd counters a superplex and hits a top rope sunset flip for two! Pillman ‘ranas out of a powerbomb for two! Badd counters a crucifix with a Samoan drop for two! Top rope Frankensteiner! Pillman kicks out! Pillman hits a tornado DDT for two! Badd crotches Pillman on the top rope and LAUNCHES him into the guardrail! BADD MOOD (tope con hilo) follows! Badd goes for a slingshot splash…but Pillman gets the knees up!

Pillman suplexes Badd into the ropes, then follows with a tope suicida! Badd dodges a rebound clothesline, resulting in Pillman crotching himself! That gets a two-count! They both build up steam and end up crossbodying each other! Badd lands on top and gets the three! Badd wins!

****1/4 - Awesome opener here and one of the best matches WCW gave us this year. Pillman did an excellent job carrying the match and worked effectively in the subtle heel role. Badd was absolutely game to keep up his end and hung in there with Pillman for nearly 30 minutes despite being relatively inexperienced. This one told a simple story, built drama, and escalated the spots. They also kept me (and the crowd) engaged for half an hour, which is not an easy thing to do.

The rumored reasoning behind the nearly length of the match was that some people high up wanted to expose Badd and Pillman as being unable to work so that they can justify cutting their contracts. Suffice it to say, that didn’t work.

We cut backstage to Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff.

After a recent loss to Randy Savage, Paul has been feeling less than wonderful and tears up the dressing room. Suddenly, GARY SPIVEY OF THE PSYCHIC COMPANIONS NETWORK makes an infamous appearance to remind Orndorff that he is indeed “Mr. Wonderful”.

Orndorff repeats the phrase “I am Mr. Wonderful” in the mirror like a daily affirmation. I bet Kevin O'Leary does the same thing.

Thanks to the help of the Brillo-headed soothsayer, Mr. Wonderful gets his groove back.

This was ridiculously stupid and poorly acted, but funny as hell. Bringing in Spivey was apparently Hulk Hogan's idea, likely to prove that there’s someone out there who’s an even bigger grifter than he is.

Gary Spivey made a name for himself over the years through many a radio and television gig, with appearances on Jerry Springer, Ricki Lake, and Hard Copy (remember THAT?) among others.

Spivey is still at it, very active on the social medias and radio. He’ll even do personal readings on the phone or in person! The wig has only grown in stature.

After Orndorff's death in 2021, Spivey claimed to have spoken to him in heaven. Sure, Jan.

We now cut to the ending of The Renegade (c) vs. Diamond Dallas Page for the WCW World Television Championship. Renegade looks to go for a top rope splash, but opts to dive onto Max Muscle instead. Muscle holds Renegade’s foot as he re-enters the ring, allowing DDP to hit a Diamond Cutter for the pin!

DDP wins his very first championship in WCW, and it’s deserved. Dude’s been getting himself quite over. The Renegade experiment is DONE. He’ll be phased down the card and into jobber status over the coming months.

We pick it up again at the end of Bunkhouse Buck & Dick Slater (c) vs. Harlem Heat for the WCW World Tag Team Championship. My guy Buck has Booker T in a half-crab.

Booker escapes and tags in Stevie Ray who runs wild, I guess. This is heel vs. heel, so the crowd heat isn’t exactly stifling. While the teams brawl in one ring, Sister Sherri and Col. Rob Parker converge in the other ring and make out. A lot.

While the tonsil hockey is happening, The Nasty Boys run in and bonk Slater with his own boot. Stevie covers for the pin and the titles!

Parker continues making out with Sherri, not giving a single shit about his team losing the belts. Love really DOES conquer all!

Ric Flair vs. Arn Anderson - We’ve seen quite a bit of the lead-up to this one over the weeks, and I’ve said that it’s been a very well-built match.

Several wrestlers are seen watching the match, so they're really pushing the importance of this one. We get some one-upsmanship early on with both guys taunting each other and trading the advantage. Arn gets early shine after winning a shoving match and slapping Flair. Arn works on the arm and Flair gets pissed. Arn slaps him again, and Flair WOOOOOs in response. Flair attempts a hammerlock, but Arn reverses!

The Enforcer continues to stymie Flair and batter the arm with various holds. Flair slickly escapes an Arn armbar (Arn-bar?) and lands the first chop of the match. Flair works on top for a bit until Arn outfoxes him with a sleeper. Flair escapes, but ends up taking a second-rope knee to the back. Hammerlock slam from Arn! Love that move.

Arn works the arm as Andersons are often wont to do, working in some two-counts with a hammerlock. Flair chops back, but Arn YANKS THE HAIR and regains the upper hand. Arn brutalizes the arm with the ring post and a Divorce Court. Flair fights back with a big chop, but Arn punches back. Flair does his flip over the buckles, then suckers Arn into diving out of the ring!

Flair follows with an axehandle off the top to the floor! Flair works over Arn in the ring for a bit with chops and a kneedrop, then attempts multiple covers with his feet on the ropes. Arn fights back with fists and a back bodydrop. Arn looks for more punches, but the ref stops him, allowing Flair to punch him low. Flair follows with more chops on the outside, but Anderson backdrops him on the floor! Flair fights back with a suplex on the floor! Back in, Flair continues to pound away at Arn, hitting a stalling suplex for a two-count.

Flair lays in some chops until Arn comes back. Flair gets caught in the Tree of Woe and gets beat down by Anderson. Flair holds onto the ropes to block the DDT, and we get a Flair Flop. Flair gets naturally tossed off the ropes, but he blocks a top rope axehandle with a clothesline.

FIGURE FOUR! They work some two-counts on that as the crowd wills Anderson to reverse, which he does! Flair breaks and clips the leg, but another figure four is countered with an inside cradle for two! Anderson collapses during an Irish whip, and Brian Pillman hops onto the apron and socks Flair! Flair fights back, but Pillman kicks Flair in the head! DDT gets the pin for Arn!

****1/4 - Yeah, this worked. I'm probably gonna be the high man here, but I really dug the work and the psychology here. Both guys started fairly tentative, but escalated the animosity and dirtiness during the course of the match. Flair and Arn wanted to each stick with their usual game plans to prove who had the superior approach, yet had to add some wrinkles here and there to throw the other guy off.

It played out like a fairly normal match, which I can see being disappointing for some expecting something more heated. However, these were guys who didn't hate each other. It was more of a family rift that needed to be settled via in-ring competition. Neither guy necessarily wanted to fight, but it had to happen. It was about Anderson wanting to step out of Flair’s shadow while Flair is needing to prove that's he was always at the top of the Horsemen food chain. The finish is a black mark on an otherwise strong human chess match, but it does continue the angle and puts into motion the reformation of the Four Horsemen.

We get a video package for the War Games match. Kevin Sullivan dicks around with dead roses and yells at a Hulk Hogan action figure.

We also get clips of earlier in the night where The Giant runs over Hogan's Black Beauty with a monster truck as Hulk tries, yet fails, to convey the correct emotion. This will lead to the infamous Monster Truck sumo match at Halloween Havoc. That is going to be a FUN review.

We cut to a pre-match promo with the Hulkamaniacs decked out in camouflage paint and battle fatigues. Hogan claims that the team drank a “couple gallons of Agent Orange” to make them impervious to pain. Guys, that would make you impervious to breathing.

We finish things off with the ending of *William Regal voice* WAR GAMES! It’s Hulk Hogan, “Macho Man” Randy Savage, Sting, & Lex Luger vs. The Dungeon of Doom (Kamala, The Zodiac, Shark, & Meng). That is one HELL of a babyface team. The heel team? Not so much. Because of the disparity in star power, the main intrigue surrounding this match is whether or not Luger will turn on his team, Savage in particular.

Hogan locks Zodiac in a camel clutch for the submission.

Per the pre-match stip, Hogan get five minutes alone with The Taskmaster, but Sullivan tries to bail. The other faces toss him in and Hogan has his way with Sullivan, throwing him into the cage repeatedly.

The Giant walks out, leaps into the ring, chokes The Hulkster out, then twists his neck!

The remaining Hulkamaniacs chase off Sullivan and The Giant as Michael Buffer calls for medical staff.

This was far and away the worst War Games match up to this point, but they’d somehow break out the shovels and out-crap it in 1998 and 2000.

The only other match that happened was Sgt. Craig “Pitbull” Pittman beating Cobra with the Code Red armbar. Well, whoop-dee-doo.

This show fared rather poorly in terms of numbers, with approximately 95,000 PPV buys and a 0.48 buyrate, 20,000 down from 1994’s 115,000 purchases. This also marks the lowest buyrate of the year for WCW so far that wasn’t Collision in Korea, and the low point so far for a WCW show with Hogan on it. The lack of stakes and the lop-sided War Games match likely didn’t convince people to part with their hard-earned.

SEPTEMBER 18th

WWF Monday Night RAW

1-2-3 Kid vs. Razor Ramon - Kid threw out the challenge to long-time friend and Kliqmate Razor last week after expressing frustration at Ramon for treating him like a little kid. Dude, you have “Kid” in your name. What do you expect? We get clips of Kid's famous upset over Razor in 1993 as Kid makes his entrance.

Kid starts off by kicking Razor's ass as he's entering the ring. Moments later, Razor catches a crossbody, places Kid on the second rope, and delivers a SUPER Sack of Shit!

Kid kicks out at two, so Razor beats him down in the corner and biels him across the ring. Kid tries some flippy stuff on Razor, but is caught with a chokeslam for a two-count! Kid soon tosses Razor and follows with a slingshot dropkick to the floor! Back in, Kid gets a spinning heel kick, then applies a sleeper as RAW ROLLS ON…

…and we're back with the sleeper still applied, but Razor fights out with a big back suplex. Ramon aggressively clotheslines the Kid in the corner, but the ref soon gets bumped. Kid slumps out of the ring, so Dean Douglas runs in and splashes Razor's back from the top rope! The Kid and the ref crawl back in, and the Kid covers for the win.

**1/4 - Kliq members tend to kick it up a notch when working with each other, so Kid and Ramon ended up having a pretty fun TV match, albeit with a lame finish. Commentary tried to convey that Razor was taking it easy on the 1-2-3 Kid, but Razor beat the crap out of him on offense.

We cut to The Report Card as Douglas gives the 1-2-3 Kid a “D” for “Dumb” for believing he alone beat Razor.

He gives Razor an “E” for “Elevate” for trying to elevate himself by going after Douglas. He gives himself an “A!”, because why not, and finishes with an “N” for “No-Brainer” as he will walk out of In Your House 3 the winner in his match against Ramon.

We now clip to the finish of Owen Hart & Yokozuna vs. Men on a Mission in a non-title heel vs. heel tag encounter. I vividly remember the prospect of the two big dudes throwing around some serious flab intriguing 11-year-old me.

Mo catches Owen with a superplex, but Yoko breaks up the pin and gets into it with Mabel.

Owen drop-toeholds Mo and Yoko follows with a legdrop for the pin. The full match is better than you'd expect giving the line-up.

Shawn Michaels and Diesel cut a promo on Yokozuna and Owen Hart ahead of the Triple Header main event at Sunday’s In Your House. All three titles are on the line in one match!

Jim Cornette offers his rebuttal in the ring on behalf of the tag champs.

Corny tries to plant the seeds of dissension among the Two Dudes With Attitudes.

WCW Monday Nitro

WCW World Tag Team Championship: Harlem Heat (c) vs. American Males - This was originally set to be the Males vs. The Blue Bloods, but the Heat attacked Steven Regal and Robert Eaton before the match and offered to put the straps on the line against the Males instead. In actuality, Regal was on his way to a tour of Japan and couldn’t be at the arena.

Everyone brawls at the bell, then things settle down with Stevie Ray beating on Scotty Riggs until a double dropkick from the Males swings the advantage in their favor. Ray comes back with a sidewalk slam on Marcus Bagwell and tags in Booker T. Booker works him over, but a missed legdrop allows Riggs to tag in. However, he soon eats an axe kick.

The Heat pound away at Riggs, with Booker landing a big side kick. We see a huge sign that says “WE WANT IT RAW”. Heh.

Riggs dodges some Booker offense and it's HOT TAG BAGWELL! He goes wild with dropkicks like any good babyface until Stevie swats him down. Sister Sherri looks to clock Bagwell with her shoe, but Col. Robert Parker heads to ringside. Sherri falls lovingly backwards into his arms. Booker goes for a pumphandle slam, but Bagwell shifts his weight and covers for the three and the belts!

* - Fairly basic, quick TV match, but Booker's offense was pretty sweet. I'm not sure why they hotshotted the titles other than to add an element of unpredictability to the live broadcast. Bagwell and Riggs weren’t bad workers or anything, but the gimmick isn’t exactly a winner.

We see “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff's new entrance, complete with THAT theme music. It's so egregiously awful that it goes all the way around and becomes awesome. His entrance is him admiring himself in a hand-held mirror. He’s got a new jacket with tails and new trunks, too! No match or anything, just Orndorff's entrance. That's how amazing this is.

We cut to “Macho Man” Randy Savage getting his pump on at a beach.

However, Kevin Sullivan appears and pushes the crossbar onto Randy's throat, then channels his inner Dale Gribble by tossing sand in his eyes! Sh-sh-shaa! The beating continues until Ric Flair pulls Taskmaster away.

“Mean Gene” Okerlund brings Savage to the ring and asks him about Flair making the save. Savage is all like “no thanks”, not easily forgiving the hell that Flair put him through during much of the year.

Savage addresses Lex Luger, who he believes cheap-shotted him during War Games. He believes that Luger, Sting, and Jimmy Hart will all end up in the Dungeon of Doom.

Lex comes out for his retort, claiming jealousy over similar aspirations of being world champion. Savage doesn't deny the likeminded ambitions and wants to scrap! The camera fades before any fisticuffs are engaged.

We see a replay of The Giant running over Hulk Hogan's motorcycle during the Fall Brawl Main Event pre-show. We see more of The Giant laughing maniacally as Hogan pretends to be angry about “Black Beauty” getting destroyed.

In this round of the Monday Night War, the WWF eked out a victory, scoring a 2.5 rating over WCW’s 2.4 rating.

SEPTEMBER 19th

ECW Hardcore TV

This week starts off with THE Cactus Jack promo. Yep, it's time for “Cane Dewey”. Cactus continues to implore Tommy Dreamer to get away from the hardcore wrestling lifestyle.

Cactus recalls a night where Terry Funk was slicing him up with a broken bottle and he considered giving up, but he then saw a sign in the crowd that said “Cane Dewey”. Suddenly, the pain of seeing somebody make a sign that encouraged violence against his 3-year old son replaced the physical anguish he was feeling at the time. He realized right then and there that what he was doing to himself was no longer worth it, and hates to see Dreamer walking down that same path. Jack recalls walking away from a six-figure deal with WCW in order to work for a PISSANT company like ECW, and laments trading a big house in Atlanta for a ‘sweatbox on Long Island’.

Jack rails against hardcore wrestling, ECW itself, and the fans, stating that the same fans who chant “HE'S HARDCORE” wouldn't piss on Dreamer if he were on fire. Dreamer turning down WCW makes Jack's blood run cold because he only wants what's best for Tommy. Jack pledges to make Dreamer see the light, sign with “Uncle Eric”, and trade in the ECW T-shirt for a pair of green suspenders.

“Welcome home, Tommy. Welcome home.”

This one still packs a serious punch. An absolutely incredible promo, probably THE best one Jack’s ever done, and the best promo of the year. It’s incredibly effective because Foley was able to get his emotions across without being over the top. It also helps that there’s that element of truth behind his words. Jack is absolutely unhinged, but he has what he believes to be legitimate justification for his actions.

Jack clearly sees his younger self in Dreamer; a desire to build his name on hardcore wrestling and to appease the bloodthirsty fans that populate bingo halls and armories. Jack has first-hand experience of the rotten fruit that kind of life bears and wants to prevent another young wrestler from sowing those same seeds. It’s much different motivation than your typical wrestling feud.

Apparently, the fan who brought the sign actually got Jack's permission beforehand. However, Foley's wife, Colette, was very upset with the sign (and he later realized how fucked up it was) and Jack drew inspiration from that anger and pain to create a truly amazing monologue. All-time stuff here.

Tommy Dreamer responds to the recent promos from Cactus Jack. He rallies back against Jack's anti-hardcore stance, explaining that “hardcore” doesn't mean weapons, but giving it your all in the ring every night.

Dreamer lists off a bunch of wrestlers that sacrificed themselves for ECW and tries to cry, but his acting is terrible. He’d get much better at crying, believe me.

Dreamer warns Jack that he doesn't want to see Tommy's dark side and threatens to go after Raven as long as he is in ECW. The content of the promo is fine, but the delivery isn't there, especially if you're comparing it to Foley's work.

We now get a promo from The Dudleys.

Dudley Dudley talks about Big Dick's recent accident and reconstructive surgery, then Dances With Dudley (the Native American Dudley) rants in Spanish (I think?) until Big Dick whacks him with his crutch.

It's time for a music video! This time, we recap the Tommy Dreamer/Cactus Jack/Raven stuff to Mad Season's “I Don't Know Anything”.

The Video Toaster gets a serious workout with various effects and transitions, including the PUZZLE PIECE WIPE. I riff on the production, but this is a great primer to get people caught up on the various goings on.

SEPTEMBER 22nd

AAA Television

WWA World Welterweight Title: Psicosis (c) vs. Rey Misterio Jr. - Less than a week after they captured the imagination of the Philadelphia ECW fans, Rey and Psicosis are back in their home promotion for another installment in their legendary rivalry. This one actually finished in 8th place in the Wrestling Observer Newsletter year-end awards for Match of the Year.

Psicosis is seconded by Juventud Guerrera while Rey has Power Raider Blanco, basically the white Power Ranger (well, before AAA got sued by Mattel for copyright infringement). Blanco was played by the future Skayde, who had a hand in training damn near all your favorite wrestlers. Rey Fenix, Claudio Castagnoli, Orange Cassidy, Naruki Doi, Masato Yoshino, Drew Gulak, the list goes on.

PRIMERA CAIDA: Psicosis works the arm early, but we then go into a crazy athletic sequence that ends with a wheelbarrow armdrag that sends Psicosis to the floor. Psicosis comes in and applies a neat rolling wristlock, but Rey escapes, and they work the mat for a bit with some nifty holds and counters.

After a rapid-fire pinfall and parity sequence, Rey and Psicosis again trade holds until Psicosis hits some rolling Germans. Rey counters one of the Germans into a front roll-up, but slips when going for a springboard moonsault. Rey recovers and dodges a charging Psicosis. Grounded octopus hold gets the submission and the first fall for Rey!

One interesting production note is that when they were showing replays of the first fall, they showed Rey missing the moonsault. You don’t see that too often in other companies, but it’s a neat way to present a blown spot as part of the narrative of the match. Not everything in a legitimate athletic competition is going to cleanly hit.

SEGUNDA CAIDA: Rey dropkicks the hell out of Psicosis’ leg and locks in another insane submission hold, but Psicosis escapes and gets the figure four, then a bow and arrow. Rey looks for a victory roll, but Psicosis just falls back with an electric chair drop. Psicosis hits a moonsault and locks in this double-armbar (with the legs grapevined, and Psicosis rocking back and forth to apply pressure) for the submission and the second fall!

TERCERA CAIDA: We really get into the high flying now as Rey lands a leaping hurricanrana from the top, but soon lawn-darts himself into the top turnbuckle. Psicosis misses a flying knee to end up on the floor, and Rey follows with a HUGE front flip springboard plancha! Manami Roll gets two, then Rey hits a spinning back kick but is soon catapulted to the floor. Psicosis follows with a BIG tope! These guys are DIALED IN right now.

Back in, Rey gets a springboard dropkick to the back of the head, then he lands a MASSIVE Asai moonsault to the floor! In the ring, Rey hits a springboard hurricanrana for two, but Psicosis comes back with a big powerbomb. Another one is countered with a hurricanrana for two! Psicosis sends Rey to the outside, then lands a twisting senton, mostly onto Juventud. Rey recovers and hits an amazing springboard plancha that almost goes halfway down the aisle!

They both stumble into the ring where Rey hits a tornado DDT and applies a standing double-armbar. Psicosis submits! Rey wins the third fall and the title!

****1/2 - This one ruled. We got some really slick, creative lucha matwork for a lot of the first two falls; the kind of stuff Zack Sabre Jr. would have fever dreams about. However, as soon as we got to the third fall, Rey and Psicosis kicked up the insanity and unleashed all manner of crazy aerial maneuvers. Nearly everything was crisp, graceful, and impactful. Seriously, that third fall was a sight to behold, and I can see why this one got so much love back in the day; it even got the full fiver from Dave Meltzer. Time and the overall evolution of lucha libre has eroded some of the luster, but it’s absolutely worth checking out if you’re a fan of lucha or Rey in particular.

CMLL 62. Aniversario

Hair vs. Hair: Silver King vs. Miguel Perez - We head to Arena Mexico for an apuestas match with two rather underappreciated workers. Miguel Perez has some mild infamy as the ‘hairy Boricua’ during the insipid “Gang Warz” period of the WWF’s Attitude Era. From what I’ve seen, though, he’s been a solid worker for CMLL and IWA Japan. He’s of the ‘hefty dude that’s agile as hell’ persuasion, much like his opponent.

CMLL’s had three matches so far, and I haven’t exactly been bowled over with stellar match quality. The high point so far was ***1/4 for Silver King vs. Apolo Dantes from June 23rd.

PRIMERA CAIDA: The Mexican fans are very much against the Puerto Rican Perez. Both guys hit flippy armdrags in the early stages, showing off their aforementioned deceptive agility. Perez dodges a dropkick but hits a clothesline after King evades a first attempt. King fires back with a belly-to-belly, but Perez flips out of a snapmare attempt and slugs King. King dodges a headbutt in the corner and dropkicks Perez out of the ring. Silver posts him a couple of times and WE'VE GOT COLOR!

Back in, King hits a missile dropkick and a tornado DDT for three and the first fall!

SEGUNDA CAIDA: King nails a big back elbow, but soon whiffs on a missile dropkick. Perez hits a powerslam, then follows with a twisting senton and a BEAUTIFUL cartwheel into a moonsault to secure the second fall! He got some height on that sucker.

TERCERA CAIDA: Silver catches a boot, but takes an eyepoke as a result. Perez loads up his glove, but King blocks a punch. He does end up eating a blow to the back of the head. King comes back with a front dropkick, but Perez returns fire with a dropkick of his own. Oklahoma roll, but King is in the ropes.

Perez hits a back suplex for two, then gets a headscissors-style roll-up for another near-fall. King soon fires back with a nice superkick for two. Perez is dropkicked out of the ring, and King follows with a big tope con hilo! King also hits a springboard plancha and suplexes Perez back into the ring. King attempts another tornado DDT, but Perez…kind of blocks it, I guess?

King still gets a near-fall, but Perez hits a Northern Lights suplex for two. King hurricanranas out of a powerbomb, but Perez kicks out as the crowd shrieks! King goes for a powerbomb, but Perez gets a rana of his own (in theory) for three!

Post-match, King is very reluctant to have his locks shorn, which is a tad unusual as he's the babyface here, but eventually loses his hair.

***3/4 - Definitely the best CMLL match I watched so far. Save for a couple of ugly moments near the end, this was very well-worked with some good heat and a clear face/heel divide. Aside from blowing the finish, King's execution is great; so much snap and impact in his moves, and he hit some nice dives. Though there was a decent amount of stalling between maneuvers at times, Perez busted out some impressively nimble offense. This was a good time.

SEPTEMBER 23rd

WWF Superstars

Ready for more Goldust? Well, I hope you are because we see him in a movie theater. Judging by how empty the theater is, he must be seeing “Hackers”.

I would have made the easy “Cutthroat Island” joke, but that didn’t come out until December. I also would have made a “Sound of Freedom” crack, but there’s actually a couple of other people in seats.

Goldie quotes the Tim Burton’s “Batman” film to call out Bret “The Hitman” Hart. They’re definitely looking to position him high up in the card fairly quickly if he’s calling out the top babyfaces. You don’t see him calling out Bob “Spark Plug” Holly by quoting “Days of Thunder” or anything.

Vince McMahon brings out Diesel & Shawn Michaels for a chinwag ahead of tomorrow's In Your House 3 main event. They come out to Shawn’s music as he continues to completely overshadow the WWF Champion. Before anything is said, Owen Hart, Yokozuna, Mr. Fuji, and Jim Cornette interrupt.

Cornette gets some digs at Shawn's outfit and Vince's alleged lack of hair while trying to drive a wedge between The Two Dudes With Attitudes. Shawn reiterates that him and Diesel are indeed brochachos. They all (well, not Yokozuna or Mr. Fuji) chirp at each other, promising to take each others’ titles. This was…fine, but I can’t imagine it compelled a lot of people to pick up the phone and order tomorrow’s PPV.

USWA Championship Wrestling

USWA Unified World Heavyweight Championship: Jerry “The King” Lawler (c) vs. Jesse James Armstrong - Armstrong cuts a promo before the match promising to redeem himself, his dad, Smoky Mountain Wrestling, and the IDIOT fans. Calm down, Miro.

Lawler comes out in his special Cleveland Browns gear. He is going to be in for some SERIOUS emotional damage within the next couple of months.

King riffs on Jesse's volatile naming history and discusses his fandom of Cleveland sports teams, having lived there when he was a wee lad.

We get some patented Memphis stalling from Armstrong to kick things off. Roadie works a headlock until Lawler escapes and hits a DDT for two. Lawler continues working on top, getting another DDT before Armstrong bails.

Armstrong stalls and complains about a phantom hairpull as USWA Championship Wrestling ROLLS ON…

…and we're back as the announcers explain that Lawler suspects a foreign object in Armstrong's kickpads. Could it be a CHAIN? Armstrong works over Lawler with punches and kicks as Dave Brown says that he indeed saw a chain! In Memphis? That's just foolishness!

Lawler comes back with punches and THE STRAP IS DOWN. The ref gets bumped! Take a drink. Armstrong produces the chain and wraps it around his fist. Take a drink. Jesse misses a fistdrop off the ropes and Lawler grabs the chain!

The ref gets up and blocks Lawler from using the chain, so Armstrong loads up another chain and socks him! The ref counts to three! We have a new champion…or not! The ref saw Armstrong's chain, and Brian Christopher comes out to snitch to the ref. Referee Bill Rush reverses his decision and awards the match to Lawler via DQ.

** - Pretty enjoyable little studio TV match here. Very boilerplate Memphis with the requisite tomfoolery, but it's still fun and decently-worked.

Smoky Mountain Wrestling

Our sole contribution from Smoky Mountain this week comes in the form of Buddy Landel, who is with Les Thatcher. He cuts another ridiculously fired-up promo here on Jim Cornette and Tommy Rich.

Cornette brought up Landel’s past, so he again goes into the days of sleeping on floors and having guns pulled on him. He's been as low as a man can be, but he's overcome it, much like he's still here after the beating the Militia gave him. Budro says Rich would “rather go through hell with gasoline britches on” than to mess with him. Landel declares himself a ONE MAN MILITIA and promises to take out Cornette’s men. Mick Foley is the top promo guy this year, but Buddy is making it a much closer race than I would have expected. More greatness here.

WCW Saturday Night

On The Mothership this week, we see Sting primed to finish off Lord Steven Regal in a WCW United States Championship match. Earl Robert Eaton looks to intervene, but Ric Flair intercepts. He pushes Eaton into Regal, and Sting pins to retain. Flair makes his case for an inexplicable multi-year deal with AEW to Sting to be his partner to face Arn Anderson and Brian Pillman.

Sting is reluctant to accept Flair’s proposal as he doesn't trust him. Flair promises to totally not turn on him this time, but Sting refuses. Flair gets down on his knees and begs for the partnership, but Sting shouts “NO! NO! NO!” like Homer Simpson after the kids keep asking if they can go to Mt. Splashmore.

We cut to Tony Schiavone, who is with Dusty Rhodes. Tony announces that Dusty will be on WCW Saturday Night’s broadcast team starting next week. Dusty is excited about being on The Mothership, DADDY.

Dusty discusses being in Hah-llywood, his various charities, and CLUBBERIN’! I can listen to Dusty talk all day, and his commentary is incredible. Bewildering at times, but incredible.

To close this week out, we get Up Close with Lex Luger. He talks about the recent controversy with him unexpectedly showing up in WCW.

Luger refutes Randy Savage's claims of a deliberate cheapshot during War Games, saying it was some incidental friendly fire in the heat of battle, but he doesn't hope to change the Macho Man's mind. He doesn't know why Savage has been anti-Lex since day one, but he expects to settle things with Randy one way or another THIS MONDAY NIGHT ON NITRO!

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Holy crap, THANK YOU again for staying with me through another long-ass week of wrestling history. Definitely give Misterio/Psicosis, King/Perez, and the Fall Brawl matches a look. Also, if you haven’t seen it already, “Cane Dewey” is very much must-watch, but Buddy Landel's promo is also a standout.

NEXT TIME: It’s WWF In Your House 3! Plus, more action from CMLL, an IWGP Heavyweight Title defense, more Monday Night Wars, and much more!

Smell ya later!